Midnight Fantasy
by Valaid
Summary: Ichigo is tired of his rocky and one-sided relationship with Grimmjow. He wants to leave, but will Grimmjow allow that? -Reposted with minor changes due to content- Rated M for language and smex, GrimmIchi
1. I don't want this anymore

**Author's note, please read!**

**Please do note that I had this story up a while back, but it was taken down due to explicit nature of the adult themes. So.. I have now put it back up... with only suggestive nature... Hopefully it will stay up now and I will have to find a way to give you the MA content part, but for now... at least you get the story XD**

**So, happy GrimmIchi day! This is a serie that will be continued, but I wanted the first chapter up for this day, so yay! Eeeh, well... enjoy XD  
And if you see spelling mistakes or grammar problems, please PM me so I can fix it =)**

**Characters are property of Tite Kubo, I own nothing more then the story in itself ^^**

**Rated M for language and smex between Grimmjow and Ichigo XD**

* * *

The city had started to buzz to life as the morning sun rose higher and higher. People were on their way to work, students on their way to school and in the parks were some people taking a morning stroll. The city had a university where many of the students only got in through scholarships, one of those students was male, 21 years old, lean body but muscular, 181 cm, brown eyes and spiky orange hair. Name; Ichigo Kurosaki, whom right now was standing in the bathroom for males at a small café, called The Little Mulberry, near the university.

Ichigo looked at himself in the mirror, white button-up shirt and a burgundy colored apron, that went from his waist down to his knees, on top of his navy blue jeans and comfortable red converse. That was what the waiters at the café had but Ichigo noticed that he had pale skin and dark circles under his eyes due to little sleep and lots of stress. He had studied at the university for almost a year now and a few weeks after he had started the university he had been employed at the café. Everything was fine until one morning, after 7 weeks of work and 12 weeks of study, when a certain male had entered the café and turned Ichigo's life upside down. The man in question was 25 years old, 186 cm, blue eyes, muscular body, sinful smile, topped off with effortlessly and perfectly styled light blue hair.

Ichigo shivered just from remembering the man. That muscular and perfect body, that according to Ichigo must be close to a god's and those deep blue eyes that sparkled whenever the man smiled that whicked and sinful smile, the way his large and strong hands could easily make Ichigo's heart beat faster and shiver in delight. But along with that, came a tongue that was venomous and a heart cold as frickin' ice and as emotional as a stone. The man held Ichigo's world and he knew it, used it and he gladly manipulated Ichigo to get his way. He had never really cared when Ichigo had to study for a test, if he wanted Ichigo in his bed then that's where he would find him. Ichigo was stressed over having to follow the man's little whims, handling school and working along with the fact that he barely got any sleep due to those whims.  
'My boyfriend really likes to.' Ichigo halted his thoughts. Boyfriend? He couldn't imagine the other man even wanted to hear that word, it was just a very beneficial relationship. Ichigo could feel anger bubble under the surface, was it even beneficial at all for Ichigo?  
There was a knock on the door and Ichigo stopped staring at himself and instead let his eyes look at the door through the mirror

"Yeah?" he asked, trying not to sound pissed off.

"We are going to open soon, don't forget you are working alone as waiter this morning."

It was Ichigo's boss, Nelliel Tu Odelschwanck also known as Nell, that was on the other side. She was a great and lovely person, who sadly was cousin with HIM. Otherwise they would probably never have met, the man rarely was on this side of the town anyway. But that morning, just like now, Ichigo had been working alone as waiter and he had come here to give something to Nell.

"_Hey, where's Nell?" the man asked as Ichigo could only stare._

"_I think" Ichigo hesitated, his mouth dry. "She is probably in her office, I can go get her."_

_The man huffed._

"_No need" he said and walked passed Ichigo towards the back of the café._

_Ichigo looked after him, was it even possible for a person like that to exist? As the man disappeared Ichigo continued with his task to check the tables one last time before more people would arrive. The café was quite large, most of the customers were students and Nell had decorated it properly. You entered the café through the corner of the building and it was divided in squares within a square. The first area was filled with small round tables with two chairs each and was closed off with low brick walls where the top was created as flower pots, holding large rubber figs. After that followed the outer edge of the inner square that she had decorated with booths so they could get more privace and large enough if students wanted to study while eating and drinking. After that came the same type of brick walls with flowers and if you followed left when you had entered the café, you would come to the counter where most cakes, cookies and drinks were places so people could see what they ordered looked like. The space on the right side of the last wall was decorated with a tv and big couches and armchairs that people could just laze around in.  
Between the counter and the relax area was a small hallway where the bathrooms were located and in the far end was a door to Nell's office and a door to the back where the kitchen was. Ichigo was still checking around when Nell came back out with the man behind her, she happily skipped over to him and introduced the man as her cousin, Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez. As Nell said his name, they shook hands and at that moment Ichigo knew that something was definitely up, usually Nell never bothered to introduce people she had a connection with._

"_Well, now that I have introduced you, I will continue with my work. Give Grimmjow some coffee will you, Ichi."_

_And with that she left them alone._

"_What kind of coffee would you like?" Ichigo asked politely and was about to move to the counter._

"_Black, no sugar and with an orange hottie" the man said and for the first time Ichigo got to see the whicked smile spread over Grimmjow's beautiful face._

_Ichigo stammered and try to laugh it off, until Grimmjow grabbed him and pulled him close._

"_Your move strawberry" he said and moved in for a kiss._

Ichigo straightened himself and gave himself a glare in the mirror. That bad attitude of calling him strawberry and kissing after barely talking a few words to each other should have made the warning bells ring, and they probably had, Ichigo had just ignored them. After that encounter Grimmjow had just left, but started a habbit of eating breakfast at the café whenever Ichigo worked morning shift. When Nell had given him new times to work when university had changed schedule, Grimmjow had somehow known but Ichigo had a feeling Nell had given the new times to him as well.  
The morning routine was simple, Grimmjow would come to the café precisely 8.15 and drink his black coffee with no sugar, waiting for Ichigo to talk to Nell around 8.45 so that he could get his time with Ichigo alone. It was so bizarre that Ichigo had actually stopped to ask Nell if she was really ok with Ichigo, after only 45 minutes of work, would take a break to be with someone and with that meaning that Nell had to be waiter for a while. Nell had simply smiled and nodded with a 'I'm happy Grimmjow has someone to be with, he drives through town to be with you after all.'  
Ichigo didn't really think that 'driving through town' was a valid argument, but had said nothing and thus continuing that bizarre morning routine.

Ichigo gave himself a clap on his cheeks and took a deep breath, he had made up his mind. If Grimmjow by the day after tomorrow had not shown any sign at all of wanting to be with Ichigo for real and actually be WITH Ichigo and not just his body, then he would cut it off. And to make sure it would really work with the cut, he had begged Nell not to tell Grimmjow that he might quit his job at the café. The plan was simple, tomorrow was his last day at the university before summer and after that he would eat dinner with Grimmjow. If Grimmjow didn't show anything then he would quit his job at the café and leave to work at his father's friends place during the two months before coming back here. He knew that to make this work as well, he had to leave the town and make sure no one really knew WHERE he went.  
Grimmjow wasn't just anybody, he was a young entrepreneur that had entered Espada Inc. 5 years ago and now he was the CEO of this region, or sector 6 as the board of directors called it. Not only that, but one of the town's most exclusive restaurants, Pantera, belonged to him. Grimmjow always seemed to know where Ichigo were, several times had Ichigo gone somewhere without telling anyone and still Grimmjow was there with an umbrella if it started raining or he was there to offer a ride home. During this leap of time where they had seen each other, Ichigo had quickly falled into the deep romantic, fucked up thoughts that Grimmjow just cared and that he wanted to know Ichigo was safe. No, that was not the case, Grimmjow had someone to follow and spy on Ichigo, creating a fuss if Ichigo did something he didn't like and he only offered a ride home because then he could molest Ichigo in the car. It was not something cute and caring, it was stalking with molesting for crying out loud!

Ichigo left the bathroom and headed straight for the coffee machine, he had to make that darn coffee soon anyway. While he put on the machine that would grind the beans he mentally kicked himself once more. The restaurant should have been a massive clue as well, since Grimmjow did take him there to eat, after it was closed and super late at night. Grimmjow paid two of the chefs extra to stay and cook during their little dinner and then nothing more. The fact that Grimmjow kept pushing him back so that the media, or anyone for that matter, would notice them was a big hint as well. Grimmjow had told him 'I don't want people to critisize you, especially since you're in the uni now' and given him a kiss. But truth be told, it was damaging for Grimmjow if it would be found out.  
The bell rang through the café, letting Ichigo know that a customer had entered. He looked up and saw his friend, Rukia, wave as she walked over to him. She was a short, with shoulder long black hair and violet eyes, her petite body making her seem smaller than she really was and the purple sundress with thin shoulder-straps made her even more tiny if that was even possible.

"Yo, Ichigo! Can I have some coffee?" she asked with a bright smile.

Ichigo smiled back at her and got a paper cup, knowing she wanted the coffee with her.

"You have the exam soon don't you" he stated as he poured coffee and a small amount of cream in the cup, putting a lid on it.

When he turned around Rukia was staring out through the window and he curiously looked out.

"Isn't that Mr. Jaegerjaquez?" she asked as Ichigo caught the site of Grimmjow walking on the other side of the street.

When Grimmjow crossed the street and headed for the door to the café Rukia quickly turned towards Ichigo and shook her head.

"I have never seen him in the flesh, but I can understand why you had trouble leaving him, hoping it would be more than sex" she said as Ichigo handed her the coffee.

Ichigo had told everything to Rukia and the fact that he had decided to break it up. Rukia was after all one of Ichigo's closest friends and even if she was childish and could be very unserious, she still was both intelligent and sensible, very good at listening and be there for you. Her eyes told him that she knew he had not broken it off yet with Grimmjow, but she understood that it would take time.

"You still up for me visiting when things start to cool down?" she asked and Ichigo nodded.

He knew that he would need her by his side after a few weeks of not talking to Grimmjow or seeing him. Rukia had told him to redirect every call Grimmjow made to her phone instead during the summer, Ichigo was still thinking about it though.  
As the door was opened and Grimmjow entered, immediately gaining eye contact with Ichigo, Rukia turned around and looked over her shoulder at Ichigo, putting two of her fingers to her lip and blew him a kiss.

"Take care babe and I see you later" she said flirty and skipped her way over to the door, of course not without first smiling knowingly at Grimmjow who glared at her.

Ichigo tried to clear his head, keeping an eye on Grimmjow closing in on the counter as Ichigo poured coffee in a cup. Grimmjow was as usual dressed in a black button-up shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows and black baggy jeans with black and blue sneakers. Ichigo looked down at the cup to make sure he wouldn't spill the hot coffee and Grimmjow leaned against the counter.

"Sit with me today" he said and grabbed his cup, moving over to one of the booths.

"Aye aye, sir" Ichigo stated dryly and followed Grimmjow.

They sat down and Grimmjow put down his cup on the table, relaxing back and spreading his arms over the backrest and looking at Ichigo with scrutinizing eyes. Ichigo folded his arms over his chest protectively, knowing that Grimmjow was about to say something that would make Ichigo get pissed off. He just could feel it in the air when those moments were about to turn up.

"That was the Kuchiki girl, right?" he asked as he grabbed his cup with his left hand and took a sip.

Ichigo shrugged.

"Girl? I wouldn't say that, she is 21 as well so I would say more like woman" he said and sighed as Grimmjow narrowed his eyes, while looking at him over the top of the cup.

Damn that man knew how to be jelous, or more like, over protective over things he deemed as his. Though Ichigo didn't really feel like being mapped in and tagged as an item that belonged to him, he was a human with his own thoughts and feelings. How had he been able to go almost a year with this man?  
At that moment Grimmjow chose to give him a huge grin and he looked Ichigo over, giving an appreciating nod.

"It's the same thing that I always wear when working here Grimm, so don't try to cover up your possessivness with some half-hearted attempt to make me feel good looking" Ichigo said as he watched the other man slowly drink his warm coffee.

Grimmjow almost seemed stressed, like he was rushing.

"Something bad at work?" Ichigo guessed loud and Grimmjow visibly tensed before relaxing again.

But Ichigo had seen it and knew that Grimmjow hated talking about his work with anyone. Too bad, maybe Ichigo would have been able to make him relax, but he wasn't going to tell Grimmjow that. He watched as Grimmjow put down the cup but let his fingers linger on the edge of the table. He drew some invisible lines before standing and grabbing Ichigo, pulling him up.

"What?" Ichigo asked and frowned at the harsh treatment.

Grimmjow said nothing as he pulled Ichigo with him towards the bathroom. When they arrived outside the bathroom Grimmjow let go and walked over to Nell's office door and opened it without knocking.

"Grimmjow! You should knock..." Nell didn't get further as Grimmjow spoke.

"I'm gonna fuck Ichigo now" he said and turned towards Ichigo whom was blushing deep red.

"Don't say that Grimmjow" Nell's voice reached the two men and Grimmjow looked back at Nell, sitting in her office chair. "Use words like quality time or something else."

Ichigo felt his heart fall, Nell knew about what they wer edoing and it always bothered Ichigo, but hearing her words now, it broke his pride and crumbled it down to nothing.

"I ain't having quality time, I'm fucking him and ya know it's simple as that" Grimmjow said before moving back to Ichigo and grabbing him.

Ichigo tried to protest as Grimmjow opened the door and pushed him inside, closing the door behind them and locked it. Grimmjow kept pushing Ichigo until he was with his back up against the wall opposite the door, with their bodies tight, tight together. Ichigo could only leave by pushing Grimmjow away from him, but he didn't really want that remembering the first and last time he had done it. The reaction from Grimmjow had been swift with one arm around Ichigo's neck as he overthrew him right down on the ground, sitting down with one knee on Ichigo's back. Knowing what had happened and that he had said no, Ichigo could probably go to the police and tell them he had been raped, but he hadn't done it. At that time he had blamed himself, thinking he had done wrong and that he had to appologize to Grimmjow, which he had done and at that moment recieved the only true commiseration anyone surely had ever gotten from the man. Right now, Ichigo didn't want to think or carry around moments like that, he was about to see if Grimmjow wanted more and so far; no, he didn't want more from Ichigo.

"What ya thinking about?" Grimmjow asked as he started without ceremony to un-button Ichigo's shirt.

"You."

Well, Ichigo wasn't lying when he said it. He tried to gain eye contact with Grimmjow, but the man just ignored him and continued with his little business. Ichigo could feel exasperation spread through his body, Grimmjow had really made Ichigo's mind more clear about the end. The question now was, would he let Grimmjow continue or should he tell him to stop before he call the cops on him.

"Hey" Grimmjow said, grabbing Ichigo's chin with his index finger and his thumb, nudging Ichigo's head up so their eyes met. "Stop thinkin' an' just kiss me."

Ichigo couldn't react before Grimmjow was kissing him, forcing him further back against the wall. Ichigo put his hands up on Grimmjow's chest, trying to pry him away. He couldn't do it.  
Grimmjow grabbed his hands with ease and held them up over the head. Ichigo tried furiously to make him release him, but Grimmjow was a lot stronger.

"Get on ya knees" Grimmjow demanded and with his left hand on Ichigo's shoulder he pressed.

Ichigo couldn't do anything as he fell to his knees, Grimmjow still holding both his hands above him. The unfareness in Grimmjow being able to hold both his hands with his right was... annoying.

"Ya really piss me off today" Grimmjow said and used his left hand to unzip and un-button his jeans. "Ya know what ta do."

Ichigo glared up at him before breathing in deep through his nose, focusing on Grimmjow's hand as he pulled himself free. Ichigo gritted his teeths, this was priceless. When Ichigo didn't move, Grimmjow grabbed the back of his head and Ichigo huffes at the pain as his hair was tugged. 'Damn it all' he thought and leaned forward, 'just get it over, Ichigo.'

* * *

Ichigo looked up at Grimmjow who was leaning forward against the wall, still trying to calm himself. Ichigo couldn't believe it, that had been way to fast. He had certainly not been prepared that Grimmjow would come so quickly and not without making any sort of hint to Ichigo.

Suddenly Grimmjow backed away, tucking himself in before he moved towards the door. Ichigo stared in disbelief as Grimmjow unlocked the door and let a glance slip over his shoulder at Ichigo.

"See ya tomorrow after ya last class" he said and then he was gone.

Ichigo was staring at the door and only when he heard a customer talk with Nell did he quickly stand, rushing over to the door and closed it. After making sure he had locked the door he walked over to the sink and stared at himself in the mirror, hickeys on his throat.

"Fuck him" Ichigo cursed as he slammed his right fist into the wall next to the mirror. "No more..."


	2. I guess that's all you'll ever be

**Author's note, please read!**

**Second one! It will continue after this as well XD  
And to those who have read Rodeo Ride, you might notice a small change in my way of writing, but don't worry! This is actually more how I write, flowing and more describing. Rodeo Ride was hard since I was stepping out of a writers block along with a theme that is quite hard, especially if you want to be time correct on everything ^^;  
Hope ya'll will like this chapter~~**

**Characters are property of Tite Kubo, I own nothing more then the story in itself ^^**

**Rated M for language and smex between Grimmjow and Ichigo XD**

* * *

Ichigo was looking through notes for his exam when his phone started ringing. He looked at it as it was moving over the table due to the vibration.

"But I still love to wash in your old bathwater, love to think that..."

Ichigo grabbed the phone and pressed the reject button, since he knew that when 'Bathwater' by No Doubt was played, it was Grimmjow. He really didn't feel like talking to him today after what had happened and Ichigo had to study for the last exam before summer. He put the phone down and looked at his notes again, even though he knew the exam wouldn't be that much of a hassle.

"But I still love to wash in..."

Ichigo hissed as he slammed his finger down on the reject button, couldn't the idiot take a freaking hint? Ichigo was busy with his life and he would not let Grimmjow disturb him this time.  
Feeling the bitterness nail itself on him, making the body tense, Ichigo let out an exasperated sigh and stood up from the chair he had been sitting on. Feeling the need to just move around, led him to making sure that the front door was locked. As he turned he glared at anything he laid eyes on; the table on which his notes lay, the chair he had been sitting on, the door that led to his small walk-in closet, the door to the bathroom, the small futon that was his bed and lastly the small table next to the front door. Cursing, he moved past the small table to the door into the kitchen and went straight for the fridge.

The kitchen was small with two small working areas, one of which was occupied by a microwave, a sink and above these were three cabinets. There was a small fridge on top of a freezer and a larger cupboard next to it. Ichigo could barely move around in the small kitchen, but he was happy with his apartment. It was more than most of his friends had, living at a dorm with no kitchen or bathroom attached. Ichigo would hate having to go through a corridor to take a shower or just a piss.

"But I still love to ..."

Ichigo glared at the phone on the table in the other room before ignoring it, instead he walked over to the fridge and took out a 0.5 l bottle of water that he proceeded to gulp down half of. When he was finished he kept staring at the closed fridge door until the front door bell sounded. Ichigo stared out into the other room as he waited to hear it again, maybe he was mistaken. Nope, there it was again.  
He put the bottle back into the fridge before moving to the door, opening without thinking.

"Yo, ya didn't answer ya phone" Grimmjow said accusingly as he sneered.

Ichigo was about to close the door, but Grimmjow put his left hand up, efficiently interupting the process.

"For a reason" Ichigo said as he leaned on the door, pushing harder.

Grimmjow sighed as he moved one step forward and Ichigo was pressed back into the room. Deeming it unnecessary to continue the small war, Ichigo sat down at the table again as Grimmjow closed the door behing him.

"Ya know I don't like it when ya don't answer the phone" Grimmjow said and put his left hand on the back of the chair and his right on top of Ichigo's notes, making Ichigo look up at him.

"I'm studying" he hissed and slammed his own forearms down on the table. "Besides, knowing the time between your calls and when ringing my doorbell, you were outside the house, weren't you?"

Grimmjow shrugged and leaned forward, letting his lips ghost over Ichigo's.

"Hmm..." Grimmjow hummed to himself. "Maybe."

Ichigo snorted and turned away.

"Leave" he said and pushed away Grimmjow's hand covering his notes.

Grimmjow quickly moved his left hand to grab Ichigo's hair, pulling back his head and once again moved his lips to ghost over Ichigo's. Ichigo tried not to frown at the pain in the back of his head, instead he glared into Grimmjow's eyes.

"What's up with ya? Truly ya can't start defying me now" he mumbled before kissing Ichigo.

Ichigo struggled, refusing to return the kiss, he would not give in to this stupid game anymore. Grimmjow only pulled Ichigo's hair more, until Ichigo finally opened his mouth to protest and Grimmjow then moved his tongue into the other's mouth, deepening the kiss.  
After a few tries to coax Ichigo into responding, he stopped and pulled away from Ichigo, frowning.

"What the hell" he said and released Ichigo from his hold.

Ichigo immediately started rubbing the back of his head.

"I told you I'm studying, my last exam is tomorrow before summer break and I want to get it right" he said and glared at Grimmjow whom snorted.

"Yeah, right, whatever. But ya better get ya skinny ass ta my apartment tomorrow night then" he said and before Ichigo could reply, Grimmjow was out the door, slamming it shut behind him.

"Freakin' PMS" Ichigo muttered to himself as he stood and locked the door.

He turned off the light and walked over to his futon, gently rubbing the back of his head. This was nothing, he had been in fist fights with Grimmjow because of Ichigo's short fuse and Grimmjow was a sadist in nature, but he rather avoided when Grimmjow was like now. Whenever he just exploded was fine, but when he was aggressive and a little violent allready from start, he was dangerous. Ichigo quickly dropped his jeans and shirt, not bothering to put them away, he needed som sleep before midnight. He quickly cuddled up under his blanket and turned to stare on the wall, pretending that the dull aching on the back of his head wasn't there. Rukia had wondered aloud on several occasions how many times Ichigo would ignore things instead of taking care of them. Saying that she was dancing with joy, when Ichigo told her he was going to break things off with Grimmjow, was an understatement.  
It didn't take long until Ichigo was in a deep sleep.

_The hot water was pouring down from the shower head, hitting the allready heated skin on Ichigo. He slowly turned it towards cold, letting the water slowly cool down his body before he turned the tap off, stepping out of the shower and grabbing a towel that was hangingon the wall next to the shower.  
The bathroom was large, no expenses saved on the luxury, with white tiles where every third tile in width and height was black. The sink was white, large and with a bathroom cabinet on the wall above it and there was a large area in the middle of the room where a rug lay before reaching the toilet. The shower itself was at least 9 times 9 feet, making Ichigo feel small in the room.  
He sighed as he reached for another towel, the first one white and the other orange. He had to admit Grimmjow had an conventional side, where Ichigo was to have his own towel at his place. He had even bought him a t-shirt and a cup to have there, even though Ichigo protested that it felt like he was moving in.  
Ichigo ruffled his hair with the orange towel, trying to dry it as he opened the bathroom door, stepping right into Grimmjow's white bedroom._

_There was a King Size bed to his right with a large painting of a panther above it and the far end of the room had no wall, but instead there were panorama windows that was tinted, letting the owner of the apartment enjoy the view over the town, but no one could see was also a door in the middle of the windows, though at first glance you could only see the balcony outside and boy had Grimmjow had a great time watching Ichigo look for the freaking door. Following the wall next to the window, opposite where Ichigo was standing, was a low bench that was white like the wall and a big mirror above, Ichigo was suspecting the mirror was there due to Grimmjow's kinky side. To the left of Ichigo was a big, white closet with sliding doors and that's where Grimmjow was standing with black slacks and a white shirt, tyinga navy blue tie that Ichigo knew was one of his more expensive ties._  
_Grimmjow had kicked Ichigo out of bed after taking a shower, telling him to get his ass cleaned while he dressed. Ichigo had wondered what it was, but now it was clear for him that Grimmjow had a meeting with the board of directors. He moved over to the bed where his own clothes lay, but only to be stopped by Grimmjow grabbing his arm, spinning him around and right into his arms._

"_I'm leaving for a meeting, ya can wait here today" he mumbled close to Ichigo's lips._

_Ichigo smiled as he folded his arms behind Grimmjow's neck and pressed his lips against the other's. Grimmjow wasn't late on putting his hands on Ichigo's back, pressing him closer before letting his hands wander south and squeezing Ichigo's butt.  
Ichigo moaned into the Grimmjow's mouth before licking the man's lower lip, letting the man know he wanted a deeper kiss. Grimmjow smirked before he moved away his head._

"_Sorry, have ta leave and ya make my shirt wet" he said before giving a quick kiss and turning to leave Ichigo._

"_When will you be home?" Ichigo asked curiously._

_Grimmjow gave him a glance over his shoulder as he grabbed one of his black jackets._

"_Later" he said before leaving the room._

Ichigo awoke startled, that dream kept coming back as a nightmare, stronger and stronger each night. It was the reason why Ichigo was tired all the time, because no matter what he did, he dreamt that dream every night around midnight. About 5 weeks into their relationship, Ichigo had seen Grimmjow off before the meeting and after that things started to change. Grimmjow had come home drunk and angry, the night ending with a fist fight and Grimmjow practically raping Ichigo. It was then and there that Grimmjow stopped showing any type of concern or feelings for Ichigo, only keeping him as a stress relief through sex.  
Ichigo rubbed his eyes as his tired brain tried to escape the memory by starting to conjure up happy endings to that dream instead of the reality that had happened. All the nights the past 4 months that Ichigo had that dream had been at least ok, but this night he couldn't hold back the tears.

* * *

It was raining heavy as Ichigo slowly walked towards Grimmjow's apartment, his red umbrella only able to shield from some of the rain as it was also windy. The cold etched itself far into Ichigo's tired body and even though his friends had tried to cheer him up after the exam with all the summer plans, he couldn't even smile. Renji, Ishida, Kira and Orihime had told him to stop moping around on the final day, but Rukia had quickly realised that this was The Day and had hushed the others to be quiet and let Ichigo have some space. He had promised them to meet up with them later for a movie at Renji's place and he had stopped by the café to tell Nell he had made up his mind, he was quitting. She had been sad that it had finally come to that decision, she had hoped he would change his mind after he had mentioned it to her, but this was how it was.

He was thankful to Kira whom had introduced him to two of Kira's childhood friends, Hisagi and Ikkaku that had a car shop where they restored old cars and now and then they would take in hot top cars to fix paintings on them or even hot them up even more. Ichigo had always liked fixing with cars and when he told the others he needed a new job, Kira had introduced him to the two guys who now were his bosses. Though over summer he would leave to help the guy his dad had told him about. What was his name again? Urahara? Yeah, something like that.

The wind let up some as the building where Grimmjow lived came in sight. Ichigo felt himself slow down, feeling as if he didn't want to go there, like he was on his way to enter into hell. In one way, he was doing exactly that. He was going to take away his things and he would tell Grimmjow that it was finally over. The part that scared him was Grimmjow's reaction to a possession deciding to leave him. If Ichigo was a painting that was on his way out the door, Grimmjow would probably burn him, and he had a fleeting feeling that was about the right answer to how Ichigo would be feeling later tonight.

Ichigo entered the right code for the building before stepping inside and shaking off his umbrella. The guard that was sitting in a booth near the door looked up at him and smiled. Ichigo gave a small wave and a forced smiled to the man, whom he always forgot the name on, and he then went to the elevators. As he waited for the elevator to reach the floor, he heard the front doors open and the guard gave a hearty 'hello, sir'. Ichigo had never heard the man speak up like that and looked over, watching Grimmjow move with quick strides over to where Ichigo stood.

"Fucking weather" Grimmjow cursed as he reached Ichigo's side.

It was then Ichigo saw how Grimmjow's hair had slicked down, making him look like a drenched cat. The black shirt and jeans that Grimmjow wore, was clinging tightly to his body. Ichigo looked back at the elevator, it was raining that day too, wasn't it? That day, when everything changed?

"Hey, ya ok?"

Grimmjow's voice reached Ichigo and he realised he was about to cry where he stood. He only gave a short nod, glad that the elevator finally was there and stepped inside. When Grimmjow didn't follow, he looked up and met the man's eyes. Concern?  
No, Grimmjow stepped inside quickly after and Ichigo knew he had been delusional, there was no way Grimmjow would feel anything close to concern. They rode the elevator in silence and as soon as they reached the right floor, Grimmjow moved quickly down the hallway and was almost all the way through his apartment when Ichigo closed the front door behind him.

He carefully undressed from his shoes and jacket, putting down the umbrella in the corner next to the door, to make sure that the hall would not get water on the floor. Ichigo then proceeded with moving through the short hall and into the living room that was a soft green color with one big, black leather couch and a freakin' huge plasma tv. There was a glass table infront of the couch and near the panorama windows on the other side of the room, was a large table with 8 chairs, 4 on each side. On the left side of Ichigo, there was a door into a room where Grimmjow did his desk job from home, a room Ichigo never had been allowed into. To the left was a small hallway with a open door to the kitchen and one door into a home gym, with an adjoined room with a jacuzzi and a shower. And at the end of the hallway was the bedroom, where Ichigo could hear Grimmjow curse from, but he didn't listen as he moved over to the glass table and picked up one of his favourite books he had forgotten there.

He carefully and slowly put it into his backpack before moving over to the large table on which his spare clothes lay, fresh from the cleaner this morning. He put them down as well before he looked up and stared out through the windows, always amazed over the beauty of the city as it was nearing night. The lights over dark buildings and the sky that hinted stars even through the light of the city.  
Grimmjow startled him when he put his arms around his stomach, pressing him back into his own body.

"What's up? Ya seem... lost" Grimmjow said as he put his lips on Ichigo's shoulder, closing his eyes.

Ichigo didn't dare answer, as he felt that familiar knot in his throat from holding back tears. He blinked a few times, trying to clear his foggy mind. Why was it so hard to just leave, to just say bye?

"Hey...?"

Ichigo was not mistaken this time. Concern had lazed itself into Grimmjow's voice and Ichigo could feel the emotions swelling as he cried while Grimmjow held him closer, hushing him, rocking him gently back and forth.

"I'm going" was all Ichigo could finally squeek.

Grimmjow stopped his motion, tensing.

"What?"

Ichigo could hear the confusion, but he couldn't care, he was not allowed to care. Not if he was going to be able to leave.

"I can't live like this anymore, I'm leaving" he whispered hoarsely before he was able to move away from Grimmjow's warm body.

Ichigo moved quickly through the living room, into the hall where he put on his shoes but halted himself from putting on his jacket as Grimmjow walked to stand only a few feet from him.

"What the hell are ya talkin' about?"

Grimmjow sounded... angry. No doubt, it must have run a thousand thoughts through his head and he always reacted with anger to situations he didn't like.

"I'm telling you I can't live like this. I'm breaking up whatever we had, if it ever was something" Ichigo put on his jacket and then his backpack.

"Ya kiddin' me, right?"

Ichigo could practically hear the sneer, as if someone would leave Grimmjow. He was the one who threw things away.  
Ichigo refused to look at Grimmjow, knowing the man would probably be able to make him forget his thoughts, at least for tonight so that Grimmjow could decide the next step more clearly.

"I'm not" Ichigo whispered and grabbed his umbrella.

Ichigo tried to make himself believe that he felt nothing for the man whom had been controlling him for the past year.

"You make me follow you like a fucking lost puppy, I can't take it. I need to study and I need to have my own life" Ichigo continued as he turned towards the front door, putting his hand on the handle.

"Ya don't need ta study, ya'll make a fine doctor anyway" Grimmjow snorted.

Ichigo felt his brain suddenly become crystal clear, and the tears just stopped. He slowly looked over his shoulder at Grimmjow, whom was only standing with a towel on.

"Ya'll call me tomorrow, I bet" he said before he noticed the change in Ichigo's stance.

Ichigo felt nothing for the man before him, he had been scared that Grimmjow would tempt him but his heart was dead of feelings and he could see the uncertainty in Grimmjow's eyes. The man before Grimmjow was not sad, lost or angry. The body showed retribution, cold, hard and final.

"I never studied to become a doctor, I'm studying to be a teacher. Thanks for making my choice a lot easier" Ichigo said and opened the door, but before closing it behind him he gave Grimmjow one last glance. "I guess all you'll ever be, is a midnight fantasy."

And with that, Ichigo closed the door to a painful chapter in his life.


	3. I see you're back

**Author's note, please read!**

**w00t! I got it up before I'm leaving. Will be going on a trip tomorrow and don't know when I'll get internet (probably sunday or monday). So I wanted to leave this to all you little wonderful people before I go~~  
Have fun and take care and I'll see ya soon with another chapter =)  
As always, notice anything like spelling mistakes or so, note me!**

**Characters are property of Tite Kubo, I own nothing more then the story in itself ^^**

**Rated M for language and smex between Grimmjow and Ichigo XD**

* * *

Grimmjow was angry. No, he was furious.  
Ichigo had been gone for 6 weeks and Grimmjow hadn't been able to find out where he was or what he was doing. The idiot had even made the choice of forwarding Grimmjow's calls so that midget friend of his picked up. It was annoying as hell, especially since she had no problems saying exactly what she thought of Grimmjow.  
He was seated in his leather couch in the living room, glaring at the tv like it was the damn thing's fault that Ichigo had decided to leave.

"Wasn't that your doing?"

Grimmjow grabbed the table and as he stood up, he flipped it and with that scattering all the papers from his work all over the floor.  
That little voice in his head had been teasing him and annyoing him like a fly ever since Ichigo walked out the door. Grimmjow gave a loud, enraged shout into the empty apartment and started pacing back and forth, while rubbing his temple. A headache was spreading for what felt like the billionth time this last week and Grimmjow got even more annoyed.  
He couldn't concentrate before due to headache, then Ichigo left and it slowly got worse. Now it seemed like it was just luck that it left him, but he often got tired and slept for hours only to wake up with the pillow turned red from nosebleed. Nell had been on him about seeing a doctor, but he had work to do and when he wasn't working... he was looking for Ichigo.  
Grimmjow felt like he should call himself Sir Stalk-a-lot, he did after all spend a lot of time trying to find the orange head. Not to mention that he had even checked if the man was still registered to be living in the same town. He knew he was probably over doing all this crap, but he couldn't help but at least find the man so they could talk instead of it ending like this. More so because his pride had been cut quite badly when Ichigo without giving any type of hint had just left.

"The hints were there all along."

Grimmjow stopped his pacing and gave an exasperated sigh, why oh why did this have to happen? Ulquiorra had been nagging on him about some new meeting with the board of directors, so that Grimmjow could take some time off.  
Well fuck that. Grimmjow had been on this job for years now and he was about to bring it to a whole new level, and the little emo fuck wanted him to take a break? No way was he leaving HIS territory to someone else. Not now, not ever.  
There was a short buzzing sound before his phone left a small jingle, letting him know someone had texted him. Well, now he had to find his phone... how fun.  
Grimmjow looked at all the papers lying on the floor and cursed loud, he didn't want to deal with this shit, it wasn't fun anymore. He quickly moved to the front door, put on his shoes before leaving and then he glared at one of the neighbours outside in the hallway as he passed them. As he reached the elevator it just reached his floor and the door opening, revealing Nell and Ichigo's midget friend.

"Well, this day just turned better" he muttered before glaring at his cousin.

"Grimm, where are you going looking like a train hit you?" Nell scolded and walked past him towards his apartment door.

Grimmjow let out another exasperated sigh before walking back and unlocking his door. The little midget was right behind him as they entered through the door. He kicked off his shoes and walked into the living room. He counted down from 3 and then it came.

"Grimm! What the heck have you done to your living room?" Nell sounded both angry and shocked.

"Did a little redecoration" he huffed and glared as Nell started looking for something among the papers. "I really would prefer if you didn't touch my stuff."

Nell glared right back at him before going back to searching. Grimmjow shook his head, but had to stop as he quickly got dizzy and instead looked at the midget. She looked like she had done last time he saw her, but this time her sundress was yellow. That time she had been with Ichigo, but he wasn't there now.

"Don't look at me like you're about to start crying" she suddenly said.

Grimmjow turned away from her and he furrowed his eyebrows tighter together than they usually were with his now constant scowl. Crying?  
Nell suddenly made a sound of triumph and came up to him with his phone.

"I just knew you hadn't looked at the message, you stupid oaf" she said and turned the phone so he could read the message.

'Ichigo is back in town.'

It was from Nell and when Grimmjow had read it two times he finally got it. He grabbed her arm, making her wince in pain.

"Where is he" he gritted out between clenched teeths.

"No way am I telling you that when you sound as if you will kill him if you see him."

Grimmjow really didn't feel like playing any games right now.

"Just tell me where the fuck he is" he said, making sure Nell got the hint that he wouldn't repeat himself.

Nell looked at the midget, and Grimmjow did the same.

"I'm telling you where he isif you promise me something first" she said and waited for Grimmjow's reply.

He didn't want to play games, he really didn't. That promise would probably be something along the lines 'you are not to speak with him' or 'you leave him alone after this time'. In reality, he didn't care right now what she made him promise, he was going to see Ichigo and that was final.

"Where is he" he repeated.

"Promise me that when you see him and have talked with him" she took a paus and Grimmjow could feel rage pulsing through him, gripping Nell's arm tighter making her wince once more. "Promise me that you will tell him that you have been skulking around, looking for him since he left."

Grimmjow felt his right eyebrow twitch.

"I don't skulk" he said and let go of Nell.

She quickly rubbed the arm where he had been holding her, glaring daggers at him, but he really couldn't care less.

"Just tell me where he is" he said, feeling patience slowly slip away.

"Promise me you..." she started again before squeaking in surprise when he grabbed her throat with his right hand.

"Tell me or I'll fucking snap your neck."

He didn't shout, but he was cold in his rage, feeling his entire body tense at the mere pressure of not fulfilling his threat and doing it before she spoke. Nell shouted to him to let the girl go as she grabbed his arm, trying to pry it away from the poor girl who had paled in fear, her eyes large and tearfilled.  
That was right, she didn't know about his past, neither did Ichigo. But Nell knew and she feared for the safety of her friend so she tried over and over again to make him release the girl. Grimmjow tried to steady himself and not actually hurting her, only threatening her but she was tough, she didn't spill one word.  
Grimmjow let go of her and looked at the two females with anger, his voice dripping with venom.

"Leave, now" he said before walking over and sitting down in his couch again.

He heard the hurried footsteps and the door slamming close. He leaned back, letting his head fall backwards and he sat there for God knows how long, untill he felt the unmistakable trickling of blood from his nose. Fuck.

* * *

Grimmjow tried to keep a cool exterior as each of the people in the room took a vote about HIS life, HIS territory and HIS office. Sousuke Aizen, who was the head of the board had called in the other two of the board, Gin Ichimaru and Tousen Kaname, along with a quick call to Grimmjow this morning at 7, so that he could be in the meeting room at 7.30. When Grimmjow had arrived, he noticed that Ulquiorra Cifer, Tier Harribel, Szayel Aporro Granz and Coyote Starrk had been summoned as well, giving him a hint what the meeting was all about. With every board member gathered along with all the different stationed company CEO's throughout the country, they were there to make a decision about what to do with Grimmjow.  
They were seated along a large table, Aizen at the short sides of the table, with Gin on Aizen's right side and Tousen on his left. Then Harribel and Ulquiorra opposite each other, then Szayel and Starrk with Grimmjow finishing at the other short side.  
The others had fancy suits on while he had chosen to only weat shirt and jeans like he usually did when working. Aizen had made a small mark that he liked them all in suits when during a board meeting, and Grimmjow had obediently followed it, but after the last meeting he had this morning felt no need to try and follow Aizen's invisible rules.

"Grimmjow, it seems as if Gin will take your place for 3 weeks as you take a time and rest. I know you have not taken any vacation since you started working here and that has been a..." Aizen paused as he let his right hand make a sweeping motion over his papers. "Small problem for me."

Grimmjow leaned his head a bit to his right has he pretended to think about what the problem could have been, but his mind was far away. The others looked at him, Harribel with eyes filled with what could only be described as concern, he didn't need her pity. Ulquiorra was the usual emo with a blank face, Starrk seemed to be dozing off as Tousen looked as displeased in Grimmjow as he always did. Well, they had never got along with Tousen's words of how they should work and that they should follow the rules to create a good working space with calm and peace. Well fuck that, Grimmjow told his workers to do their shit and not meddle in others business, if they didn't follow he either fired them or told them to fuck off themselves.  
Gin had his usual creepy grin and Szayel looked like he was in heaven, like he had discovered a beautiful new species of ... things, that he liked to collect and study. No wonder he was on the research department and boy was Grimmjow glad it was on the other side of the fucking country from where he lived.

"Whatever" he said and stood up, earning a glare from Tousen. "If that is all you have to say I'm out of here. Have fun finding everything you need."

As Grimmjow started walking towards the door Tousen stood up and opened his mouth, but Aizen quieted him by raising his hand and Grimmjow slammed the door shut.  
He knew he acted like a hormonal teenager, but what gave them the right to walk in and decide that he should rest? All of the workers he met quickly pressed themselves against the hallways, trying to be as quiet and invisible as they could as he with long strides passed them. He heard some of them giving a relieved sigh as he didn't turn to them. He huffed as he pressed the button for the elevator, glaring at the door until it opened so he could step inside. Everyone in the elevator knew the the look on his face and even if it wasn't their floor, they stepped outside, leaving him alone.  
As the elevator slowly descended Grimmjow could feel the headache slowly starting to spread, like a crown of iron it nested at the back of his head and spread fast making the whole head feel heavy and he closed his eyes. He tried to steady his breathing, calming himself down and by the time the elevator reached the bottom floor, he had gone from furious to angry.  
The doors opened and he walked fast through the lobby and out to the parking lot. He grabbed the car keys in his pocket, unlocking the car from a distance and felt himself sigh with relief that once more his baby was unharmed. The first day the car had been standing on the spot it was, it had been severly damaged by some idiot for a truck driver. He took a walk around his dark blue Ford Mustang GT, but he didn't see any damage at all so he quickly hopped in and tried to start the car.  
Grimmjow furrowed his eyebrows in confusion.

"What the..." he tried again and it almost started. "Really..."

Grimmjow cursed loudly as he tried again and this time succeded. He knew exactly what he was going to do his first few minutes of 'vacation', he was going to take his car to the special workshop at the edge of town.  
He cursed again as he left the parking lot, speeding through town and he didn't see, but he think he drove through a red light. Who cared.  
As the workshop came into view he sighed and relaxed his tense body, he really didn't want to start a fight with one of the owners. The man was obviously a fan of fighting and Grimmjow really didn't want to start a brawl when he had a headache and was still pissed off at the earlier... confrontation with the board.  
He turned up and drove close to one of the open garages and turned off the car, as he climbed out he saw Hisagi walk out. They gave a nod at each other and Hisagi then pointed at the car.

"What's the problem?" he asked as he dried his right hand on his navy blue jeans.

Neither Hisagi nor Ikkaku was really the stereotypical car workers. They dressed in jeans that were ripped and had a black t-shirt on, no one would imagine that they ran a workshop for the more expensive cars. When Grimmjow had heard that Ikkaku had set it up, he knew it was the place to go. Even though Hisagi probably didn't know and Ikkaku hoped no one knew, Grimmjow DID know that Ikkaku had been a top car repairer and driver on the streets. He was known under another name on the streets though and the cops had tried to catch him a few times. In the end a big accident had been his save from the underworld as everyone thought he died, and he was able to become someone else. Ikkaku didn't know it, but Grimmjow had been one of the men making sure he had never been found out about.

"It didn't really wanna start, I got pissed and came here before I smashed it to pieces."

Hisagi raised his left eyebrow at the statement from Grimmjow. He then gave a small smile before holding out his hands for the keys that Grimmjow quickly gave him.

"Go inside and take a rest in a chair then. We have a new guy so you can just ask him if there is coffee."

Grimmjow left Hisagi to his work and walked inside the workshop. Ikakku looked up from where he was working on an engine and gave a small wave. Grimmjow nodded and then 2 pair of eyes turned towards the person who had suddenly gasped and dropped something on the floor. The sound of the metal hitting the floor made it ring in Grimmjow's ears and he hissed, ready to tell the new guy that he clearly was a cluts, but the words caught in his throat.  
There, in ripped naby jeans and black t-shirt was none other than Ichigo. Grimmjow had to blink a few times before he could really believe what he was seeing. The other man was staring right back at him, seemingly more surprised. No wonder, the little midget had probably told him that she had not given away his location, so Grimmjow turning up here due to a small absurdity, was probably far off the chart.  
Ichigo's hair had grown a little longer and he had a lighter tan, he had surely been working outside a lot during summer. Grimmjow really didn't care as his brain kicked into gear and he moved forward. Ichigo didn't have time to react before Grimmjow was right in front of him and had grabbed his arm.

"Where the fuck have you been?" he growled low and glared at Ichigo.

Ichigo didn't waver as he tried to make Grimmjow let go of him.

"I have no obligation what so ever to tell you where I am, where I've been or where I'm going" was the coarse reply.

Grimmjow tightened his grip.

"Well how bad for you, because you will tell me and we will have that little chat we didn't have when you decided to storm out of the apartment."

Ichigo snorted.

"Stormed? I walked calmly and coldly out of that apartment, because you made it so fucking easy."

Grimmjow narrowed his eyes. Ichigo rarely used language like that, so he knew Ichigo would do his best to slip away from this talk.

"I think we're gonna go somewhere private" Grimmjow said, but before he could do anything, a hand grabbed his shoulder.

He looked back and saw Ikkaku standing there.

"Please let go of Ichigo, I don't want any trouble. You can talk about whatever you want when he's not working."

Grimmjow felt the anger from the past weeks, the troubles of sleeping and then sleeping too much, the headache, the nosebleeds and Ichigo just disappearing like he never existed. He tried to calm himself, but the grip on Ichigo's arm tightened and his brown eyes grew big with fear.

"Grimmjow, what..."

Ichigo didn't get further as Grimmjow almost threw him away from himself and turned towards Ikkaku. The other man was ready and threw a punch that Grimmjow easily dodged, moving himself to the left side of Ikkaku and jabbing his hand in the other's stomach. Ikkaku grunted, but didn't let it bother him as he took a few steps away from Grimmjow while at the same time turning around.

"Grimmjow, what is your problem?" Ichigo almost shouted.

He didn't listen as he focused on Ikkaku, quickly taking a step forward and at the same time blocking a punch from the man. He couldn't give a punch back as Ikkaku forced him to take a step to the side by leaning backwards and give a kick.  
Hisagi appeared in the opening and after a few seconds of taking in the scene he was next to Ichigo, holding him back from the fight. Grimmjow had his eyes locked on Ikkaku and his next movement, easily dodging, but stepping past him, ready to jab his elbow in the mans ribs. But as he did, Ikkaku was able to grab his shirt and as he was forced to the side, the shirt ripped.  
Grimmjow froze where he stood as he heard Ikkaku's gasp, Hisagi looked at them both, wondering what happened and Ichigo stared at them. Ichigo knew that the only thing that Ikkaku could possibly have been reacting to was the tattoo that Grimmjow had on his right side lower back. It was the number six and when Ichigo had asked the answer had been 'it's only a number'.

"You're the sexta?" Ikkaku asked shocked.

Ichigo locked eyes with Grimmjow and for the first time, he saw pain in those wonderful blue eyes.


	4. Let's talk

**Author's note, please read!**

**So yeah, another chapter~~ Aaaand yeah, I know what most of you will say at the end of this chapter... seems to be a thing I have when writing XD So sorry in advance *teehee***  
**This chapter has been a bit slow since I've only been able to write on it around midnight, so I have been tired as *beep*, hopefully there are no major mistakes that I have missed. Enjoy~~**

**Characters are property of Tite Kubo, I own nothing more then the story in itself ^^**

**Rated M for language and smex between Grimmjow and Ichigo XD**

* * *

Grimmjow didn't move as Ichigo and Hisagi stared at him confused while Ikkaku looked as if he had seen a ghost, which he had in a way. Five years ago the espada had suddenly disappeared and the members were only talked about in hush whispers now, street rats still scared that the largest gang would come back. The sexta, Grimmjow, had been known for his violence and being a good fighter, earning lots of money in matches set up between gangs. He had been the one Aizen used to settle scores with others gangs and drive fear into the younger and the fresh members. At the end of ther reign only a few identities ahd been revealed and those had been taken care of by other gangs.

"I'm not him anymore" he said with a cold voice, closing his eyes as he knew he couldn't watch Ichigo's face as the words would start to sink in.

"You're one of the city's big shots, I know very well that you're not him anymore. The question is what to do, I don't really fancy Ichigo being chased by you. I don't know what he did, but I prefer him alive" Ikkaku said, straightening up as Grimmjow glanzed at him.

Grimmjow relaxed himself, letting Ikkaku know that he wasn't going to do anything violent either. He then dared himself to look at Ichigo, who seemed more confused than before.

"I won't hurt him, I just need to" Grimmjow knew he had to form the right word. "Talk to him."

Ikkaku snorted at the coldness in Grimmjow's voice, like that had helped his cause. Grimmjow realized that very quickly and turned towards Ikkaku.

"Let's have a talk just you and me."

Ikkaku looked at him with scrutinizing eyes, looking for any sign that it might be a trick. He didn't spot any, so he nodded his head towards the office and walked over there, Grimmjow close behind. When they had entered, Ikkaku closed the door and sat down at the desk.  
The room was small and cluttered with ring binders and lose papers, the desk was small with a laptop on it. Grimmjow sat down on the only other chair in the room, luckily for him the chair was right next to the door, so he didn't have to wade through the papers.

"So, you expect me to just let Ichigo follow you home so you can have your 'talk' with him."

Ikkaku didn't sound impressed by the 'talking' reason, but Grimmjow only shrugged.

"I know who you used to be, after all I did finance most of your races and parts for your car" he said calmly and saw how Ikkaku tensed. "Not to mention that I did pay up some when you decided to disappear and Yumichika contacted me, to make sure that you could vanish."

Ikkaku sighed, he knew all to well that Grimmjow said all that to show that he would bring Ikkaku down if he as much as hinted that Grimmjow used to be the sexta. The only question now for Ikkaku was Ichigo, why would he let a former gang member just walk away with him.

"I see, but I still don't find any good reason to let you walk away with Ichigo" he said after spinning his thoughts a bit.

"You don't have to, I can talk to him later when he has finished his work for the day. I only wanted to make you aware of the fact that if one goes down, so does the other. The espada was split up, a few of them killed, while the rest of us remained with Aizen in the new company. We still have enemies, so I would make sure not to spill anything since it can also endanger those who we care about."

Ikkaku nodded, he knew there were one man that still searched for him and he couldn't imagine all the enemies that the espada must have accumulated.

"Fair enough, I'll tell Hisagi to fix your car and you can be on your merry way. Just make sure that Ichigo can come to work properly tomorrow, I don't want him all bruised because of your temper."

Grimmjow stood up and opened the door, Hisagi was not in sight as Ichigo picked up the metal pieces he had dropped when seeing Grimmjow.  
Ikkaku walked outside and asked Ichigo where Hisagi was, Grimmjow didn't hear the answer but Ikkaku was walking outside within a few seconds and Grimmjow walked over to Ichigo.

"We still need to talk" he said and watched Ichigo stand up, metal pieces in his hands.

"I really don't think we have anything to talk about" he answered.

Grimmjow snorted.

"No? You sure about that? Because I don't think I ever really got a good explenation to why you suddenly up and left me like you did."

Ichigo looked away, uncertainty clear in his eyes.

"Maybe you should just look back on how you treated me and you'll have your answer. Now I have even more reasons to avoid you. Sexta? When were you planning on telling me that?"

"Never" Grimmjow said coldly, making Ichigo flinch before glaring at him.

"Never? Well that's nice, really up for building something there."

Grimmjow gave an exasperated sigh.

"I couldn't build anything with you due to trouble, and since I'm no longer the sexta and that part of my life has nothing to do with you, it's in the past, I really found no reason to tell you. It's not very good that you know, the more who know about it, the bigger the risk."

Ichigo continued to glare.

"Bigger risk for you, yeah. You never cared about me or what I wanted, so maybe I think that you could have sent at least one thought my way."

Grimmjow growled low.

"Aren't you being a bit too sensitive there, a big risk for me is a big risk for anyone I know. You have never dealt with gangs and all the little street rats running around, so don't try to lecture me about it when all I did was keep you away from it" Grimmjow paused as he put his hands in his pockets. "But ok, if you're gonna be like that, maybe I should just leave you alone then and if someone finds out that you have been hanging around with me and who I am, I won't save your sorry little ass."

"I don't NEED your protection, I'm good enough on my own" Ichigo was frustrated.

Grimmjow squinted his eyes before stepping in close to Ichigo, forcing him to look up.

"You say that because you don't know the whole story about my past, you don't know anything about the world I used to live in. Don't try to look down on me because you think you're better when it comes to handling emotions."

Ichigo stood there, staring at Grimmjow as he left. If it was something Grimmjow hated, it was people looking down on him, like they knew better. The look that Ichigo had, whispering that Ichigo could protect everyone and everything around him on his own. Grimmjow hated those eyes, because reality was a lot more cruel than Ichigo could even imagine.  
When Grimmjow stepped outside the workshop, Ikkaku turned towards him from where he stood next to the Mustang.

"The car is fixed, I'll send the bill as usual" he said as walked past Grimmjow.

He stopped a few steps after, looked over his shoulder as Hisagi handed over the keys to Grimmjow.

"I would be thankful if you could clear things up with Ichigo, but not violently."

After that he and Hisagi disappeared into the shop as Grimmjow walked over to his car, hopping in and turned it on. He took a deep breathe to calm himself before he settled back into the seat looking up as he saw motion outside the car. He could only stare as Ichigo jogged over to the car and opening Grimmjow's door.

"Give a me a sec to change" he said and barely waited for Grimmjow's surprised nod before slamming the door shut and hurrying back inside.

Grimmjow stared after him and really couldn't get his head around why Ichigo suddenly was going to get into the same car as him. But he waited patiently a few minutes before he saw Ichigo coming out from the shop, waving bye to the others. Ichigo had always had something for tight clothes and Grimmjow had hated that side, always made him so damn tight in his own pants. Right now Ichigo was wearing tight purple jeans and a tight black shirt, his stride was confident as he moved to the car, walked around it and opened the passenger door. As he sat down Grimmjow started driving out of revenge for the clothes, earning a yelp from Ichigo.

"You could at least wait until I closed that door" Ichigo said vehemently.

Grimmjow didn't reply as he started his drive towards Ichigo's apartment.

"Wait, we're not going to your place?"

Grimmjow's eyebrows shot up and he couldn't help but glanze at Ichigo, maybe he was joking.  
He wasn't, he was dead serious.  
Grimmjow looked back at the road as he made a turn so that he could drive around towards his apartment instead.

"So, what do I owe the honor?"

Ichigo snorted, looking out as the town passed by. He didn't reply and Grimmjow didn't press it, guessing he should be glad Ichigo at least wanted to be near him.  
The drive didn't take long as Grimmjow almost passed the speed limit a few times, ignoring one red light. As they neared the apartment Ichigo spoke again.

"I see you're still driving like a madman."

Grimmjow didn't say anything, Ichigo should know by now that Grimmjow didn't buy the car just for show, but for fun as well.  
As he parked the car he felt he should say something, but he couldn't say anything. Ichigo left the car, walking towards the building and Grimmjow felt himself follow Ichigo like a puppy.  
It angered him some that Ichigo suddenly got this grip, and the worst part was that Ichigo seemed aware of Grimmjow's hesitation and carefulness.

"You really sure you want me to talk to you?"

Grimmjow looked up at Ichigo, that question had been unexpected.

"That's my line. You're the one who didn't want to have anything to do with me and now you suddenly follow me home."

The had a short staredown before Grimmjow pressed in the code for the door and went inside. As he stopped in front of the elevator Ichigo came up close behind him, he could feel the other man's breath on his neck. Why was he so close? It made Grimmjow feel like he suddenly wasn't the predator, but more like the hunted.  
They entered the elevator, staring at each other during the ride and then suddenly Ichigo smirked. Grimmjow felt his eyebrow twitch, he really didn't like this new Ichigo who knew that he was the hunter right now. That had to change.  
Before Ichigo could react, Grimmjow had moved forward and pressed his lips against Ichigo's. The response was immediate and Grimmjow knew it was probably instinct, but he was surprised that Ichigo let it happen. When Grimmjow almost appeared frozen, Ichigo made his move and let his arms wrap around the other's neck, pressing his body close. It had just the effect Ichigo knew it would have, Grimmjow took one step forward, pressing Ichigo back against the elevator wall and pressing his tongue against Ichigo's lips. There were no hesitation as Ichigo opened his lips and let Grimmjow start his little exploration.  
Grimmjow let his hands settle on Ichigo's hips, but not long after did his right hand travel south and cupping Ichigo's jewels, making him moan. Grimmjow kept massaging him as he pushed Ichigo closer to the wall with his upper body, forcing Ichigo to lean his head and with that deepening the kiss.  
The small sound of a bell made them realize that they were in fact in an elevator and had just reached their floor. Grimmjow broke the kiss and stepped away, letting his left hand slip through his hair as he tried to calm down. A giggle made both of them turn and stare at the woman standing in the hallway, when both of them saw it was Nell they let out a relieved breath.

"The fuck..." Grimmjow cursed before brushing past his cousin. "What are you doing here?"

He heard both Nell and Ichigo close behind him, the answer came as he stopped to unlock his door.

"A little angel told me you were... requested to take a small holiday for a while. It seems it started out well."

"Let me guess, that little angel was Gin" Grimmjow said as he walked inside his apartment.

Ichigo followed quietly, not wanting to say anything since he was interested in that little "request". Nell slammed the door shut just to make Grimmjow glare at her, which she responded to by sticking out her tongue.

"Now tell me, how will the two of you pass this lovely evening?"

Grimmjow glared at her before he moved to sit down on the couch in the living room.

"None of your business" he replied dryly.

Nell huffed but smiled as she noticed Grimmjow's eyes glued onto Ichigo as he moved past him to sit down on the couch.

"Well, Gin didn't tell me how long your little vacation is, so how long is it?" she asked and faked hurt as Grimmjow glared at her.

"3 weeks if you must know" he said before standing up.

He walked over to her and grabbed her shoulder, turning her around and pushing her towards the door.

"Leave."

The command was simple and Nell knew she was pushing her luck when she turned around to defy him.

"No, I want to know how you will spend this three weeks."

Grimmjow sighed and tried to calm himself, the headache was back.

"Well, first of all I will talk to Ichigo and then I will spend the coming weeks doing whatever the fuck I feel like for the day, so now piss off."

Nell once more stuck out her tongue before turning to leave.

"Play nice children" she said and gave a wave over the shoulder.

Ichigo couldn't help but smile as Grimmjow rubbed his face and gave a low growl. Grimmjow heard Ichigo stand and he turned around towards him, feeling a bit dizzy at the sudden turn. Ichigo looked at him with concern.

"Are you ok Grimmjow?" he asked before Grimmjow started bleeding from his nose. "Oh my god, Grimmjow! What the heck..."

Ichigo didn't get further as Grimmjow passed out.


	5. How many days did you say?

**Author's note, please read!**

**Puh! Finally up~~ I'm on a LAN right now, so busy with other stuff XD Hope you haven't waited too long (ha! who am I kidding? waiting?) anyway, here is a new chapter and I think that if I get time you will see next chapter up in a few days =)**

**Characters are property of Tite Kubo, I own nothing more then the story in itself ^^**

**Rated M for language and smex between Grimmjow and Ichigo XD**

* * *

Grimmjow slowly opened his eyes, blinking a few times at the sudden light before he opened them fully and took in the room he lay in. He was obviously in the hospital, half sitting in the bed since the pillows had been bedded so and the bed was lifted in the front. The other beds in the room were empty and next to the bed on Grimmjow's right side was Ichigo sitting, he had folded his arms, using them as pillow as he was sleeping but still managed to keep his right hand holding Grimmjow's.  
Grimmjow carefully removed his hand and let it slip through Ichigo's hair, knowing the other was a heavy sleeper and wouldn't wake from the action. He slowly massaged Ichigo's head and a low murmur was heard from Ichigo. Grimmjow couldn't help but wonder how long he had been sleeping and Ichigo was there, seeming like he always had been.

"I see you're awake, Mr. Jaegerjaquez."

Grimmjow looked up at the door where a doctor with white hair, white robe and glasses stood. He seemed like a very serious man and Grimmjow just knew that the man probably were more than a doctor at this place. The man started speaking as he moved towards Grimmjow's bed.

"I am Ryuuken Ishida, doctor and director of this general hospital. Normally I do not care specially for patients, but my son asked me this time since Ichigo is a friend of his."

Grimmjow nodded, not really knowing what to say as the man allready knew who he was.

"We have taken a few tests on you, but we don't know more than your cousin and Ichigo could tell us. So will you please tell me how you have been feeling lately" the man continued as he stood by the end of the bed.

Grimmjow was about to tell that he was fine when Ichigo moved, and opened his eyes. Grimmjow looked at him as he rubbed sleep from his eyes and then looked up, meeting the gaze.  
Grimmjow half expected a cheerful outburst or maybe an angry comment, but he was a bit shocked as Ichigo launched forward and hugged Grimmjow tight.

"Hey Ichi, take it easy, I'm not dying here" Grimmjow said jokingly, but the result was Ichigo hugging him tighter.

Grimmjow could feel Ichigo starting to shake and his shirt became wet, but he didn't say anything as he wrapped his own arms around Ichigo and let his forehead rest on the other's shoulder.  
They sat there, holding each other for what felt like an eternity before Grimmjow finally let Ichigo go, pushing him from him so he could see the other man in the eyes.

"Everything is fine, don't stress yourself like that" he said and Ichigo tried to stop crying.

Grimmjow knew that Ichigo had been strong, never crying or showing any weakness since they started going out, but this seemed to have taken a toll on him.

"I'm sorry to say that everything is not ok, at least as I see it now" Ryuuken said, reminding the two men of his pressence.

Grimmjow saw how Ichigo tensed, clearly he had not been aware of the third man. Ichigo blushed as he refused to turn and look at the doctor, letting Grimmjow do the talking. Grimmjow sighed.

"What do you mean?"

"I simply mean that having a really bad headache, passing out and nosebleed at the same time should be checked. Why haven't you gone to the doctor before it got this far?"

Grimmjow sighed again, looking the man right in the eyes.

"I don't have time for..." Grimmjow didn't get further as Ichigo grabbed the front of his shirt.

"Who the hell don't have time to check their health? Do you WANT to die?"

Grimmjow smacked away Ichigo's hand, hushing at him. He shouldn't be so loud at a hospital and he had no right telling Grimmjow what he should and shouldn't do.

"I'm perfectly fine, I just passed out" Grimmjow said and this time Ichigo punched him.

He looked startled at Ichigo who was glaring at him with tears in his eyes and behind Ichigo was Ryuuken standing, holding a hand on Ichigo's shoulder to calm him.

"You have been out cold for three days you retard!" Ichigo shouted this time, not being able to hold back his rage. "How the hell do you expect me to be calm and think that 'oh everything is fine, he is just resting' when you haven't made one sound of being sick before you go collapsing right in front of me?"

Grimmjow wanted to smile at the cute, fake voice Ichigo made when he said what he should be calm and think, but he knew it was not a good timing to smile at Ichigo since it would surely earn him another punch in his face.  
But three days, that was quite... some time. He didn't know what to really think about that fact.

"Mr. Jaegerjaquez, can you please tell me how long you have had these problems and if there is anything additional you would like to add to the symptoms list?"

Grimmjow sighed as Ichigo was forced back down on the chair next to the bed by the doctor.

"I sometimes have problems sleeping due to the pain, but sometimes I sleep longer then I plan to. I just seem to go into hibernation" Grimmjow paused to think if there could be anything else and he watched as Ichigo's fist tightened around the bedsheet. "I sometimes get nauseous, but haven't really thrown up."

Ichigo glared down on the bed as Grimmjow talked, getting more and more pissed at the man. Ryuuken nodded as he printed down what Grimmjow said and then looked at him.

"Well, how would you describe the pain?" he asked.

Grimmjow hated questions like these, the pain made it hurt, how the heck else would you describe it? Ichigo realised that Grimmjow had problem with describing it, so he decided to help some.

"Is it a static pain? In your neck up to your head or is it at your frontallobe?" he asked gently.

Grimmjow shook his head.

"No, it's like a pulsating pain that change side of the head. Sometimes it's on the right and sometimes on the left side."

Ryuuken nodded and once more printed down what was said.

"Do it get worse when you stress or do work outs? Do you have any problems with your vision when you get these attacks?" he asked.

"Yeah, well... I haven't really thought about it, but I guess it does. And my vision gets blurry easily if I turn around too quick" Grimmjow said and couldn't help but let his right hand seek Ichigo's hands.

Ichigo gladly grabbed Grimmjow's hand, holding it under his own two hands as Ryuuken looked at his notes.

"Well, it could be a severe migraine and you can get medecine for that, but I want to rule out tumor, leukemia and some other illnesses. Though I don't think you have any of those, but let's make ourselves sure" he stopped to look at Grimmjow who had paled as he stared at him and Ichigo was hiding his eyes as he stared down into the bed.

Ryuuken sighed and walked to the door, turning around and giving a short nod with the words that a nurse would come get Grimmjow when it was time for a test and then he left.  
Grimmjow looked back at Ichigo and was about to tell him to not worry when Ichigo grabbed his shirt again.

"Don't you fucking DARE telling me not to worry. Sure I do think that leukemia is a bit farfetched and I sure hope that a tumor can be ruled out as well" he took a deep breath before he continued. "But I do hope for your sake that you have a good explanation to why you haven't told anyone about this OR gone to the hospital yourself!"

Grimmjow glared right back at Ichigo.

"What do you care? Didn't you leave me?" he said with malice. "I do think that I have the right to not tell you anything."

Ichigo let go of Grimmjow and sank deeper down on the chair he was sitting on.

"I thought I did, but my feelings still won't leave even if my mind does. I tried to run, but in the end it only hurt more, knowing that I didn't talk it out with you and the fact that in the end I loved you even if you were a jerk, but you never held any feelings for me."

Grimmjow snorted.

"How the heck am I supposed to know you loved me?"

"I thought it was pretty obivous, besides I did tell you..." Ichigo looked away, trying to hide the tears threatening to fall.

"When? Was I sleeping when you said it? Because I sure as hell have never heard those words leave your mouth. Besides, I don't think it matters anymore what you have felt or do feel now. You left and even if I do like that you seem to still want to sleep in my bed, I ain't gonna take your shit about my health."

Ichigo frowned and turned to once more look at Grimmjow whom shrugged at him.

"When did you get sick?" Ichigo asked quietly.

Grimmjow met his gaze with a raised eyebrow, clearly showing that Ichigo has to be high on something, asking a stupid question like that. Ichigo cleared his throat.

"Let me rephrase that..." he said and sat up straight in the chair. "When did you notice that something wasn't really ok?"

Grimmjow shrugged again.

"It sneaked up on me, but everything became worse when you left..." When their eyes met again Grimmjow frowned at Ichigo. "No, it was not your fault."

"The hell it's my fault. How the heck am I supposed to give you leukemia or a tumor in your brain? I'm quite sure I didn't give you migraine either since you have been stressing for a long time."

Grimmjow snorted, he was stupid to have thought Ichigo would feel guilty, the boy was way to clearheaded to let emotions shadow logic in a moment like this. If Grimmjow had still been unconscious he might have felt guilty... might have.

"So, why did you suddenly decide that I was worth your attention again after not seeming to exist on earth for a while?" Grimmjow really liked to know the answer, but it seemed as if Ichigo wasn't going to tell him that right now as he looked away.

Grimmjow sighed and looked up at the ceiling, why did Ichigo have to be so damned complicated?

"Hey, why the heck did you think I was going to be a doctor?"

Ichigo's sudden question made Grimmjow stare at him like he had lost it.

"What...?" Grimmjow wondered what moved around inside the head of Ichigo right now.

"Yeah, I mean... I told you that I was studying to be a teacher when we first ate at your restaurant, so why did you think I was gonna be a doctor?"

Grimmjow thought about it for a while, he had never really thought about the fact that he had gotten it wrong.

"Wait... did you say our first time at the restaurant?" he looked at Ichigo whom slowly nodded. "You mean the time you had those super tight and skinny jeans that hugged your ass so nice?"

Ichigo looked at Grimmjow confused, what had the jeans to do with anything? But he nodded nonetheles and Grimmjow let out a short laugh.

"No wonder I had no idea what you were talking about. I was probably high on thoughts how to ravish you after the dinner than to actually listen to you."

Ichigo blushed crimson as he punched Grimmjow's arm.

"What the hell is wrong with you? You pervert!" Ichigo wanted to keep punching the living daylights out of Grimmjow as the other was laughing.

"It's your own fault for distracting me!" Grimmjow exclaimed as he rubbed his arm.

Ichigo hissed at Grimmjow like a cat before he stood and turned to look out through the window. Grimmjow couldn't help but laugh at Ichigo, the reaction was priceless and Ichigo knew damn well that he was very ... distracting for Grimmjow. Otherwise he would never have bothered with Ichigo in the first place.  
A nurse entered the room and smiled at them as Ichigo turned to watch and Grimmjow slowly calmed down.

"Mr. Jaegerjaquez, we will do a CT-scan on you now so if you would please come with me" she said and smiled politely as Grimmjow sighed and stood up.

Ichigo was on his way to follow when Grimmjow stopped him.

"Go home and get some proper sleep, there is nothing more you can actually do here you know."

Ichigo glared at him and on his way to protest when Grimmjow grabbed him and pulled him close, so he could whipser in his ear.

"Go home and sleep, we have lots to talk about and I really don't want you to fall asleep then."

With that he let go of Ichigo and followed the nurse out through the door, leaving Ichigo behind. He cursed Grimmjow under his breath before he left the hospital, how was he supposed to be able to sleep at all now?


	6. The one who knew Grimmjow

**Author's note, please read!**

**So, I'm sorry for the loooooooong delay! But here you go, a new chapter XD Things are heating up and well... let's just see who knows Grimm best hohohoho!**

**Characters are property of Tite Kubo, I own nothing more then the story in itself ^^**

**Rated M for language and smex between Grimmjow and Ichigo XD**

* * *

_End of last chapter:_

_"Go home and get some proper sleep, there is nothing more you can actually do here you know."_

_Ichigo glared at him and on his way to protest when Grimmjow grabbed him and pulled him close, so he could whipser in his ear._

_"Go home and sleep, we have lots to talk about and I really don't want you to fall asleep then."_

_With that he let go of Ichigo and followed the nurse out through the door, leaving Ichigo behind. He cursed Grimmjow under his breath before he left the hospital, how was he supposed to be able to sleep at all now?_

* * *

Ichigo was staring down into the frying pan before him, so lost in his own world he barely heard the sizzling from the pan. He had just gotten home from the hospital and felt hungry, so he ended up throwing some vegetables and some meat in it. It was probably Yuzu, his younger sister, whom had done some shopping since he was coming home, because he clearly remember leaving an empty fridge this morning.  
He sighed as he stirred the mash in the pan and he cursed himself for his stupidity earlier this day. When he saw Grimmjow's eyes, the way he spoke to him and they way he moved, Ichigo could think of nothing than to see if Grimmjow still desired him or if it was 'just' a talk. It was now clear that Renji, a man Ichigo had met at Urahara's, was right.

"_So you mean to tell me that you just left without asking him anything?"_

_Ichigo looked up at the red head on the other side of the table they were seated at, with a window on his right side and the table cloth was a soft pink. The food in front of them was fried vegetables with rice and some chicken, and they lay on black plates. They were in the dining room of the Urahara Inn where both of them worked this summer, Ichigo had changed to a white t-shirt and a pair of demi jeans for dinner while Renji still had the working pants and shirt on. Both of them worked to take care of various things around the inn, so in the end they were gardener, plumber and carpenter among other things. Renji was tall, muscular and his body littered with tattoos, even on his face.  
Ichigo poked the vegetables on his plate with his fork, feeling that it was nice to have everything off his chest and even though Rukia knew, someone like Renji who was an outsider, made it a lot easier to breathe and he could come up with an independent view. Ichigo sighed andglanced around the small room that were filled with ten square tables and forty chairs to match the number of guests that could be accommodated at the same time at the inn. Urahara was a very wierd owner, with blond hair and a green and white striped hat,with that constant fan shielding his mouth. He wore a dark green coatee on top of a lighter green robe which was tied at the waist with an obi and he had light green pants and walk around on clogs. Ichigo had quickly noticed that Urahara was very... special._

"_There was nothing to ask about. Besides it was clear he wanted nothing with me since he didn't even know what I was studying" Ichigo said and leaned back in his chair, glancing out through the window._

"_There were plenty to ask about if I may say so. Quite obviously something happened that night that changed him, something very important. I mean, people just don't change like that for the heck of it and usually they turn to beasts when you move in, because then they don't need to court you. He just suddenly did it and if he really only wanted you for your body, why would he bother trying to call you now? I bet in his eyes you look real yummy, but if it's just the lust of flesh I don't think he would bother, he could easily find someone new instead of you. Why would he lay down energy to get you back?"_

_Ichigo looked back at Renji, some of what he said did make sense, but was reality really that sweet?_

"_I don't know Renji, I just..." he paused and once again used his fork to poke his vegetables. "I don't know what to do. I still love him and I want him to be like he used to be."_

_Renji shrugged._

"_Then talk to him. See if there is a chance that he will return, see what happened that night and why he is desperatly trying to push you away and still keep you."_

_Ichigo felt his eyes widen._

"_What do you mean?" he asked and Renji sighed._

"_Look, all I can say is that I really don't think a man in his position would bother with keeping you around if there were no feelings. He could easily just wave some money and people would literally throw themselves at him. Obviously with his changed attitude he is trying to push you away, but he wants you close so he can't just tell you to fuck off. And there is still the fact that even now, he wants to talk to you, clear things up. If I only had someone for his or hers body, I wouldn't other clearing things up, it's over and that's that. I bet that when you get home, show up at his appartment and then talk to him, he will tell you something."_

_Ichigo swallowed hard._

"_And if he is still a bastard?"_

"_Then he is a bastard, that you happen to love. But don't brush him off as a complete bastard until you have talked to him. If he is the king of bastards as you claim and have no reason for it, then dump him and you can move on, if only just a little easier. But if, just IF, he tells you he has been treating you bad because he was afraid of something else, then please listen to him, talk to him and tell him that if he still wants you, care for you, then he will have to chose between being a bastard and lose you, or be his original self and take you."_

_Ichigo chuckled._

"_His original self? What if that bastard side is his real side? And that first he only tricked me?"_

_Renji smiled._

"_Do you really think that Nell, whom you seem to adore, would let her cousin trample all over someone important to her?"_

_Ichigo sighed, it was true enough. Nell had never really objected in anyway except for Grimmjow's use of words sometimes. In reality... she had almost supported the couple._

Ichigo shook his head, opened a cupboard and grabbed a plate, he needed to eat since the food was overdone and he was hungry as hell. No idea to dwell on what Renji had said right now, though Ichigo still felt that gnawing stress that maybe Renji was more right than Ichigo had thought at first. Grimmjow had been a bastard to Ichigo again, but he still wanted to talk and he still wanted Ichigo's body. What irked Ichigo the most was the fact that Grimmjow blamed his clothing for not listening to him, if he was interested in Ichigo he would have listened, no matter how tempting he looked.  
Ichigo slammed down the plate next to the stove. This really made him stressed and irritated, there was no way anything made any sense and there was no way that whatever Grimmjow said would make it more clear.

* * *

Rukia looked up at the grey sky, it was heavy and it was clear that it would start raining soon. She sighed and continued walking in the direction of Ichigo's apartment, skipping a few steps as she thought about the happy news she could give him. Going on a concert would hopefully make him think of other things than the gloomy thoughts that Grimmjow gave him, he had seen so beaten and tired as he had been sitting next to the unconcious man at the hospital.  
She looked up at the sky again as the first droplet reached the ground before her, in a matter of seconds the rain was pouring down and she smiled at the thought of her brother telling her to take an umbrella with her as it looked bad outside. Her brother was even the one paying for the two concert tickets since when she had told him about Ichigo being troubled, he had suggested that she did something fun with him. Though it was probably not a good idea telling Ichigo that her brother was paying, then he would refuse to go.  
As she continued to walk, she thought about what Ichigo had told her when he came back; about the man he had worked with, Renji. Ichigo knew that Rukia was adopted as sister into the Kuchiki family, but what he didn't know was that Rukia knew Renji and that she knew that when he was a bit older than fourteen, he had stopped being an innocent little lamb. Rukia felt that what Renji had said could be true, he had seen many pained families and children not knowing where to go. He had seen the cruel reality of people not caring about others, so he should at least have a hunch that what Grimmjow did was strange. But at the same time, who knew Grimmjow really well? She didn't and she doubted that Ichigo knew everything about the man, he had just suddenly become one of the more powerful men in this town over a year, coming from seemingly nowhere. That was something that had troubled her, but her brother had told her not to worry about it.

"I doubt Ichigo would let anyone hurt him for long and I doubt he would so simply trust someone."

Rukia wanted to believe her brother's words, but Ichigo had a tendancy to trust people because they were simply humans, he always felt he owed them at least that. But being hurt was true, Ichigo rarely let people walk all over him, which she had seen several times herself. Grimmjow was different though, he didn't make fun of Ichigo for his hair, he was ripping his heart out.

* * *

Nell looked out on the heavy rain falling over the town, feeling her heart clench. Four years had passed since she last saw the man whom had entered her little café this morning and it brought up memories that had laid buried deep down in her. When she first saw him, she felt her breath hitch, he looked just as cool as ever, but his eyes told that he had not stopped watching pain take over the world. When he had asked for her cousin, she was first afraid to tell where he was, feeling that he might want to demand some kind of revenge for something even though she knew it could not be something so bad, but she had ended up telling him when he had uttered just that one word that tipped her over. That man looked cool and sometimes innocent even, but within him he held a storm that even Grimmjow could be wary of, especially if they were discussing something that concerned both of them.

"Ichigo... when did you get to see the one man that Grimmjow trusted the most?" she whispered to her empty room.

The rain became heavier and Nell could only wonder if it symbolized the storm that could have entered with the man or if it symbolized that it would wash away the pain.

* * *

Grimmjow stared at the man who was standing at the end of the bed in the hospital, it was as if a ghost had entered his vision. Denim jeans, a dark grey t-shirt with some strange, pink smiley on, he had a dark purple bandana around his head, tattoos and red hair.

"Long time no see... Renji" Grimmjow said and gave a whicked smile, almost rivaled by the one on Renji.


	7. That's a heavy punch, Renji

**Author's note, please read!**

**GOOD NEWS EVERYONE! Go to my front page for the link to the place which contains this series, with the explicit content! So far only the first chapter is one with explicit content, but this chapter will be up later this night with it. But so far you get the story. So I hope everyone is happy as I am =D**

**And I'm soooo sorry for the long delay, but I've been so ill and still am. Though I hope this chapter will bring you something that makes up for the wait**

**And the extra part with Renji is to get more of him for my friend La-Volpe~~ so just for you dear!**

**Characters are property of Tite Kubo, I own nothing more then the story in itself ^^**

**Rated M for language and smex between Grimmjow and Ichigo XD**

* * *

Ichigo looked up at the grey sky, the rain had not let up for one second it seemed for several days. He sighed and continued walking towards the university, he didn't want to be late for his writing.  
He hadn't spoken to Grimmjow since that day at the hospital and to be honest; he still didn't want to. Call him scared if you want, but he just couldn't handle the stress of their relationship together with studying. Renji had visited him suddenly two days ago, which was three days after he had spoken to Grimmjow and Renji had shocked him by letting him know he knew Grimmjow.  
Renji had been honest and told the story of how he had grown up with Rukia until she had been adopted and after several attempts to get along with her brother, Renji's sudden realisation to his love for the man had taken a turn on his personality and he had cut off everything with Rukia and her brother and ended up in a gang that stood under protection of the Espada. Renji had been directly controlled by Grimmjow, whom had come to trust him and they shared a bond now that was for them unbreakable.

Ichigo sneezed in the cold air and shivered, maybe he was catching a cold, this was bad; but his mind quickly wandered back to Renji and Grimmjow. Renji had told him how Grimmjow had been the brutal torturer, making squelers pay and people break and tell things they knew, so him showing any kind of emotion was beyond Renji's understanding.

"_But I saw a light in his eyes when he said your name Ichigo. Something I thought for sure I would never live to see, he loves you... he's just Grimmjow, he don't know how to do these things. He has only violated and taken what he thinks is his. If he showed you love in the beginning as you said he did, then you changed him but something changed him back. Find out what and he'll be yours if you can break him away from it."_

With that Renji had considered his visit over and he was going back to trying to find a location for his new shop. Ichigo didn't have time to ask before Renji was mortified as Rukia wet and flustered ran into the apartment saying her brother was at the hospital. Talk about a big shock for both Rukia and Renji before Renji had shouted something about being late and ran. Rukia and Ichigo left to see her brother, whom was all ok since it was just his secretary whom had overreacted on his headache. Byakuya had thanked Ichigo for accompanying Rukia and make sure she was ok, until she said that Renji had been in Ichigo's apartment, the looks on Byakuya's face made Ichigo realize something akin to what Renji must have felt when he saw Grimmjow.

Could a man like Byakuya look so happy to hear someones name?

Ichigo didn't know how to react on what Renji had told him about Grimmjow, but he could believe it. However, it made it harder for him to just go to the hospital and talk with him, even if he itched to know what the hell was wrong with him. What if he had cancer?

Ichigo shook his head and stepped inside the building, quickly finding his way to his lecture hall, he ha d to stop his brooding for a while and do his writing, he just felt he had to nail this one, he didn't have time for extra assignments.

* * *

Ichigo sighed as he walked out in the hallway, it had been hell on earth and he just prayed he had made it.

"Wow, did they kill you in there? Never heard you give such a sigh before?"

Ichigo looked up startled at Grimmjow, whom was standing right in front of him. HOW had he not seen him? He was first out of the room and Grimmjow was standing there in all his sexy glory.

"I just..." Ichigo hesitated with a nervous laugh. "Uhm.. I just don't think I made it."

Grimmjow snorted.

"Right..." his voice was filled with sarcasm.

Ichigo smiled nervously as some people looked at them and the girls started giggling and whispering, no doubt about the fact that Ichigo was talking to a big shot of the town.

"Can we just... leave?" Ichigo asked and started walking, Grimmjow only a step behind. "Are you feeling better?"

He tried to make it sound like a casual question, but he could feel Grimmjow stare into his back.

"Yeah, they found out what the illness is."

Ichigo whipped around and Grimmjow walked right into him, which didn't bother him but Ichigo got an unpleasant muscle wall right in his face. Ichigo huffed and pushed away since Grimmjow seemed to enjoy the closeness.

"So...?" Ichigo asked and rubbed his nose.

"So what?" Grimmjow seemed to be more interested in being close to Ichigo than actually bother to tell what the illness was.

"I care, I actually happen to care what the hell is wrong with you" Ichigo hissed and took another step away from Grimmjow.

"Prissy bitch, is this what I get after a long time away from you?"

"Five days" Ichigo corrected.

"A long time of no touching or holding, it drives even me insane. I was lucky enough to run into your midget friend whom first didn't want to tell where you were. But after promising to tell where Renji was, she easily gave you up" the smile Ichigo got after the last statement, made him want to punch the living daylights out of Grimmjow. The smug bastard.

"Well, I still think you've acted like a bastard, just because I want to try and repair it again doesn't mean I have forgiven you just yet. And I still want to know what you are ill in."

Grimmjow smiled and stepped up next to Ichigo, whispering in his ear.

"Well, how about I show you how to forgive me, tell you what my illness is and then we can be on our merry way to a relationship again."

Ichigo looked suspicious on Grimmjow.

"Show me?"

Grimmjow gave his trademark shiteating grin.

"Yeah you know... the way that makes you scream my name..."

"Killing me?"

Grimmjow looked shocked on Ichigo before he gave a loud laugh.

"That's brilliant, Ichi. Really it is."

Ichigo smiled big, but became aware that people were staring at them even more since Grimmjow had started laughing. Some of the girls were blushing like little virgins and whispered to each other.

"Damn..." Ichigo said and turned to leave.

Grimmjow stopped him by grabbing his right arm, with wondering eyes he looked at Ichigo.

"Let's go somewhere else, I don't like the attention."

Grimmjow smirked and nodded as he let go of Ichigo's arm.

"Sure, I'll give you the attetion you need."

Ichigo threw a glance over his shoulder.

"For a minute..."

Grimmjow furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. What was up with Ichigo today? Well, seeing as Ichigo was tense, something Grimmjow had learned to see, he guessed it was because he had just appeared out of nowhere, a day that Ichigo was clearly stressed.

Ichigo led them out from the university and down the road towards his apartment. They walked in silence as Ichigo was pondering what to say and Grimmjow was enjoying the view of Ichigo's ass a few steps behind.

"It feels like you're stalking me, I don't enjoy it" Ichigo said and looked over his shoulder and noticed where Grimmjow's eye s were fixed at. "I see why it feels like I'm being stalked..."

Grimmjow grinned at him, but didn't say anything as he moved to walk next to Ichigo instead.

* * *

Renji smiled as he looked out from the store he was in and saw Ichigo walk past with Grimmjow in tow, though Renji hoped Grimmjow could be less obvious with his enjoyment of the view. He chuckled as Ichigo looked over his shoulder, saying something and then Grimmjow grinned and walked up next to him. Ichigo really knew how to make Grimmjow seem strangely obedient, like a dog.

"Well, he better take this chance serious or I'll beat him to a pulp." Renji said to himself and turned back into the store filled with stuff for collectors.

"Who will you beat up?"

Renji almost screamed as Byakuya was standing in front of him, talking to him.

"Bya... I mean... Mr. Kuchiki" Renji said and blushed crimson.

Byakuya looked at him with a straight face, no emotions shown.

"I thought I told you that you could call me by my first name."

Renji nodded.

"Yeah, but I was what... 15 then? It's strange to do so after such a long time." Renji tried to excuse himself.

"Yet you started with saying it, but changed it. So out of habit you were about to call me by my name."

"But I did call you by your name... your last name" Renji couldn't help but smile.

Byakuya raised his left eyebrow.

"So you did."

Renji looked away before he cleared his throat.

"So, why are you here? Wait... how did you even know I was here?"

Byakuya just looked at him and Renji thought he wouldn't get an answer.

"You collect certain teacups and this is the best shop to look at some of them. And I came to talk to you obviously."

Renji smiled nervously, he thought Byakuya didn't know about his obsession with teacups. Wait, how did he know that he would go there just today and right now? But he didn't get to ask as Byakuya turned to leave.

"My house tonight at seven. You're invited to dinner, come as you are dressed now, those jeans look good on you."

With that he was gone and Renji felf his face burn bright red.

* * *

Grimmjow smiled over his coffee, though his cheek burned and hurt after Ichigo's punch. His right hook was dangerous and Grimmjow always tried to avoid it, but how could he know that Ichigo was not for the idea of a shower together. And did he have to hit him when he just suggested they'd take it together, Ichigo didn't even say anything, just punched him and left to shower.

"But I guess it's a good way to make sure I won't sneak in" Grimmjow said to himseld and gave a huge grin, God he loved... did he love Ichigo? Probably, just that it took Renji to shake him.

"_So I heard... that you've been quite mean even after trying to clean yourself up" Renji said and sat down on the chair next to Grimmjow's bed._

"_Have no idea how you know anything, but you were the ones he knew who had squeled so..."_

_Renji smiled._

"_Guess the squeler" he said and leaned back, this was going to be interesting._

"_Well, I don't even know what I've been accused of."_

"_You really don't treat your lovers well, but I'm surprised you kept one for a year, even though you seemed to treat him well only for a short period."_

_Grimmjow felt shock grip him and he stared at Renji._

"_You met... Ichigo?" He could barely ask, the words seemed to want to get stuck in his throat._

_Renji nodded._

"_Yeah we worked this summer at the same inn and got to know each other." Renji put up his hands in defence at Grimmjow's glare. "We didn't do anything beside work and talk. Has he made up with you or is it on hold until you're better?"_

_Grimmjow sighed and slipped his hand through his hair._

"_It's on hold, where I put it. He's way too stressed just because I'm ill, and I don't want to pressure him more than that."_

"_I still wonder why you treated him so nice and then just changed after... what was it he said four or five weeks. And after a meeting with the board, did Aizen say anything?"_

_Grimmjow tensed and Renji nodded._

"_I see, well... I only have one thing to tell you; he's giving you one more chance and if you puzzle together Ichigo you easily understand that is more than you could have asked for in the beginning."_

_Grimmjow sighed and ran his hand through his hair again, starting to rub small strands._

"_I know that, honestly I can't even believe the luck that struck me when he sat down in my car that day."_

"_Because he loves you."_

_Grimmjow stopped fiddling with his hair and looked shocked at Renji._

"_You can't really tell me you haven't noticed. Why the hell would he otherwise put up with your douchebagery."_

_Grimmjow frowned._

"_Is that even a word?"_

"_IT IS NOW!" Renji said loud and grabbed Grimmjow's collar. "Think about what he means to you, after all; you just got one more chance, a chance you don't deserve. Think about it..."_

_Renji let go of him and then stood up to leave._

"_He's under my protection now, and you now damn well I ain't afriad of you if it comes down to it."_

_Grimmjow looked at Renji and then laughed._

"_No worries, Ichigo has allready left me once so I think he can do it again. Besides, if I hurt him again I think I should be more afraid of him than you."_

_Renji laughed and walked to the door._

"_As long as you get it."_

Grimmjow looked up at the door to the bathroom as the water stopped running. It was time to make a move...

Ichigo opened the door and was immediately enveloped in Grimmjow's arms. He looked up curiously at the man whom took his chance and kissed him.

"I'm sorry I acted like crap and I still don't know how to fix it all, but I'll try."

Ichigo smiled and wrapped his arms around Grimmjow's neck.

"I'm happy you at least will try... for now."

Grimmjow smiled back and then realized that Ichigo was still only in his towel.

"Ohoo, what's this?" he said and easily pulled it off. "I think that has to go."

Ichigo frowned.

"Bastard..."


	8. Morning Routine

**Author's note, please read!**

**Thank you so much to Misc. Ink who now beta reads my stuff and helps me with the spelling and grammar! You have no idea how happy I am that you do this 3 Millions of hugs to you!  
Some serious stuff is coming up now, not many chapters left~~**

**If you want to read the last chapter with the lemon you can read it here: /works/516318/chapters/912225 (the bigger part of what Ichigo remembered) and so if you are a bit pissed that I wrote a flashback on a chapter right behind when it happened, remember not everyone read the smut on Ao3.**

**And please, even if you leave kudos at Ao3 (which I'm happy for) do leave a review here as well. They make me happy~~**

**Characters are property of Tite Kubo, I own nothing more then the story in itself ^^**

**Rated M for language and smex between Grimmjow and Ichigo XD**

* * *

Ichigo was washing his face after waking up, Grimmjow was still sleeping in the room. He looked at himself in the mirror and sighed, he really had missed being with Grimmjow, especially the first Grimmjow, that made love to him, like last night.

_They lay there for a while before Ichigo turned to his side, towards Grimmjow and looked at him._

"_Not all the way? I thought you would be eager for that..."_

_If Grimmjow didn't know better, he would say that Ichigo sounded disappointed._

"_You really sure you can handle it? I haven't touched you in a while..."_

_Ichigo snorted and gave Grimmjow another smack on his thigh._

"_I'm a healthy man, I do know how to pleasure myself. Besides, I was taught by the best" he said and gave a small smile._

_Grimmjow smirked and moved to cover Ichigo with his upper body._

"_Oooh, and who is the master? Someone I need to take care of?"_

_Ichigo smiled mischievously._

"_I don't think you can, he's pretty strong..."_

"_Really now. Well, you do know you are talking to an ex-Espada, I think I can handle him."_

"_Nuhu, he's strong and cool. He's handsomeness will make you fall" Ichigo said and gave Grimmjow a quick kiss._

"_Keep talking, I need to be able to identify him..." Grimmjow said and gave Ichigo a kiss back._

_Ichigo laughed._

"_Well, he has this ridiculous hair color" he said and proceeded to run his right hand through Grimmjow's hair._

"_Even more ridiculous than yours?"_

_Ichigo nodded._

"_You have no idea."_

"_But you still like it..." Grimmjow said and the warmth in his voice made Ichigo feel an uncomfortable sting in his eyes._

"_Yeah, I still like it. But the thing I love the most is his eyes. They really are mirrors to the soul in his case, you can always see what he is feeling in them and you can always get a heads up when he is pissed just by looking in his eyes and then you can avert the anger."_

"_So that's why I never was able to be angry at you for so long, you sly bastard" Grimmjow chuckled and gave Ichigo another kiss. "But you know, I can't believe my eyes are more revieling than yours. Like how I know that you are about to cry, your voice was steady, but your eyes betray you. You're too good for me Ichigo..."_

_Ichigo couldn't help the tears that came and he sniffed._

"_I love how he was able to go back to the man I used to know, that I fell in love with..."_

_Grimmjow smiled and dried Ichigo's tears._

"_And that's why I will not have sex or fuck you tonight, I'll make love to you, with all my heart..."_

_Ichigo laughed._

"_That was really cheesy."_

_Grimmjow chuckled as well._

"_Well, I hope you're not allergic to cheese then..." he smiled and kissed Ichigo again, whom responded._

Ichigo blushed at the memory and sighed again.

"You really need to stop doing those death sighs, it's creeping the hell out of me..."

Ichigo looked shocked at Grimmjow's reflection in the mirror. When had he gotten right behind him? The man was stark naked, while Ichigo at least had the decency to have underpants and a t-shirt on.

"You know, I really like your bed hair. It's a lot fluffier than usual..." Grimmjow said and leaned forward to nuzzle his nose in Ichigo's hair.

Ichigo looked at Grimmjow closing his eyes as he obviously enjoyed doing his usual morning routine of playing with Ichigo's hair, though usually they were still in bed.

"My hair is not fluffy" Ichigo said and slowly straightened up so that Grimmjow would be able to react on time.

Grimmjow let his arms wrap around Ichigo and kissed his neck.

"It's fluffy as hell, especially in the morning and you didn't give me my morning nuzzling" Grimmjow said and lightly nipped on the skin of Ichigo's neck.

Ichigo huffed and shook his head.

"Which reminds me" Grimmjow continued and let his right hand slowly wander down to Ichigo's underpants. "You didn't give me much this morning..."

Ichigo blushed as he remembered that Grimmjow almost demanded at least a jerk-off in the morning.

"Really, I have class today" Ichigo started and turned to push away from Grimmjow. "Can't we do it when I get back home?"

Grimmjow smirked.

"As far as I know, you said you're always free the day after a test."

Ichigo put his hands on Grimmjow's chest and pushed, trying to ignore the hand on his ass.

"That was last semester, it's a new one now, and you really knew that but not what I'm in school for. That's pathetic..."

Grimmjow leaned forward, showing Ichigo that he really had no heart in pushing the other away.

"I'm always aware of when I can molest you and I think you're trying to make a lame excuse. You're in school to become a doctor."

Ichigo felt himself snap in anger and he grabbed Grimmjow's shoulders.

"I'm kidding Ichigo, you're going to be a teacher. What for I have no fucking idea. But I couldn't care less as I get to spend time with you on holidays" Grimmjow said with a teasin voice.

"What the fuck was the point of getting me angry?" Ichigo hissed and squeezed his hands untill Grimmjow grunted at the pain.

However, it didn't take long before Grimmjow gave him a smile.

"Because I love that fire that alights in your eyes when you get angry. You become really frightening; I love how you, for one second, believe in yourself and your ability to take on anything..."

Ichigo looked shocked on Grimmjow before he huffed.

"There you go again being all cheesy. You really have a soft side don't you, Mr. Espada?"

Grimmjow narrowed his eyes.

"That was a long time ago and you're the only one I'll ever be soft to, not even Nell gets to see this side. It's all about you."

Ichigo smiled and let his arms slip around Grimmjow's neck and he gave him a quick kiss on his lips.

"I'm honored Mr. Softy..." he teased and Grimmjow responded by squeezing his ass cheek.

Ichigo reached up and gave Grimmjow a kiss, letting it linger and slowly moving his lips before he felt Grimmjow lick his lower lip, begging for entrance. Ichigo teased by moving back, but was quickly trapped against the sink by Grimmjow, and Ichigo was being kissed by an eager mouth.

* * *

Grimmjow really loved the sated feel after their little morning exercise, but dirty as well.

"Shower is mine now" he said and turned towards the shower.

Ichigo smiled and grabbed a towel that he dampened before cleaning himself, throwing his t-shirt in the hamper and pulled up his underpants. Damn Grimmjow and his morning routines.

* * *

They were peacefully eating breakfast, Ichigo with two pieces of peanut butter toast and for Grimmjow, a plate with bacon and eggs, when there was a knock on the door. They looked at each other curiously before Grimmjow stood to open the door, Ichigo thankful that he had at least put on his jeans.

"Ichigo, can I..." Renji started as the door opened but then quickly shut up at the sight of Grimmjow. "What the hell are you doing here?"

Grimmjow smiled.

"What do you think?" he asked and when Renji looked at the blushing Ichigo, he smiled as well.

"Well, I guess you didn't play the tooth fairy..."

They both gave a loud bark of laughter and Ichigo couldn't help but feel that was an internal joke between the two.

"But I vaguely remember telling you to be nice to him, not scew him the moment you saw him..."

There was a flash of smile on Grimmjow's face, letting both of the others know that he thought it was the same thing.  
Grimmjow stepped to the side, letting Renji join them and asked him what was up.

"Well, you see, I need a place to hide for a while. I was invited for dinner and I didn't go. I chickened out and the person sure is pissed at me. He has left five voice mails and sent ten texts, not to mention he has called even more than that..."

Ichigo and Grimmjow looked at each other before Ichigo stood up and patted Renji's back.

"Sorry, you will have to man up and face the poor fella. Who the hell did you stand up by the way? You make him sound like a stalker.."

"Byakuya..."

As the name slipped out of Renji's mouth, Ichigo instantly pushed him towards the door.

"Sorry, I ain't getting dragged into a small lovers' quarrell with you two, espcecially since Byakuya is freakishly scary when pissed."

Renji tried to slip past Ichigo and managed to do so.

"Why the hell do you think I want to hide?"

Grimmjow sighed.

"Hey, I don't know this Byakugan guy..."

"Byakuya" Renji instantly corrected.

Grimmjow looked at Renji to tell him to shut up.

"I don't know him, but I would prefer if you didn't get me nor Ichigo involved in your troubles. And why the hell didn't you go to dinner with him?"

Renji fidgeted with his pony tail.

"Because when I talked to Rukia and learned she wouldn't be home that night and it was at their place, I kinda got scared."

Ichigo and Grimmjow looked at him like he had suddenly become a very ugly monster.

"You idiot! That's when you're supposed to go there and then sweep them off their feets" Grimmjow said and put his hand over his face. The stupidity astounded him.

Ichigo cleared his throat.

"Since I know that 'sweep them off their feet' is Grimmjow's way of nicely saying that you should fuck him..."

As Grimmjow gave a big, proud smile, Ichigo felt punishment was needed and jabbed two of his fingers in Grimmjow's side, earning a pained huff, making it Ichigo's turn to smile.

"I think the problem lies in the fact that he wanted time with you and you didn't go. That's bad Renji. Right, Grimmjow?"

As Grimmjow didn't answer, Ichigo gave another jab and another grunt of pain was heard.

"Yeah, you should have gone there and..." after a warning glare from Ichigo, Grimmjow decided not to continue his crude sentence.

Renji sighed.

"I know, I just didn't have the courage to at the time."

There was another knock on the door and Ichigo opened this time, not surprised to see the man on the other side.

"Well, I guess Rukia spilled the address pretty easily" Ichigo said and crossed his arms in front of his chest as Byakuya sniffed haughtily.

"I've known all along where you live. I do make it my business where people who move into my sister's circle lives and what they do. I'm glad you got another job."

Ichigo sighed and nodded his head into the apartment to let Byakuya know he could come in. As Ichigo turned he almost started laughing as Grimmjow was trying to stop Renji from closing the bathroom door.

"Renji, I think we need to talk" Byakuya said and Renji immediately stoped stuggling with the door, sending Grimmjow crashing into the bathroom.

Ichigo laughed and waved at Grimmjow.

"Let's go out and give these two some space" he said as Grimmjow stood up. "The spare key is in the pot by the window, you can give it to Rukia later" he continued to Byakuya whom nodded and gave a small smile as Grimmjow grabbed his shirt and left out the door right before Ichigo.

Ichigo sighed as he closed the door. That was the second time he had seen Byakuya smile when it came to Renji. The idiot must know how Byakuya felt, or Ichigo would beat some sense into him.


	9. Let's try again

**Author's note, please read!**

**I'm really sorry for taking so long to write this, but I've been so sick. Now though I seem to be back on track =)  
And about Grimmjow's illness, I suffer from it and I've been in the state he is in, so no complaints there please. I know how it is to have it.**

**Thank you so much to Misc. Ink who now beta read my stuff.**

**And please, even if you leave kudos at Ao3 (which I'm happy for) do leave a review here as well. They make me happy~~**

**I take commissions now, you can sign up here on if you don't have a dA account otherwise the link is on my front page.**

**Characters are property of Tite Kubo, I own nothing more then the story in itself ^^**

**Rated M for language and smex between Grimmjow and Ichigo XD**

* * *

Ichigo watched as Grimmjow unlocked the door to his apartment and he smiled to himself; he felt like the day when he had been on his first date with Grimmjow. He wore the exact same clothes as that day;, tight, purple jeans and a white t-shirt. He had felt Grimmjow's eyes on him the whole walk through the city and it was nostalgic to that night.  
As they entered through the door, Ichigo got an idea and wondered how quickly Grimmjow would catch on. They kicked off their shoes and entered the living room and as Grimmjow sat down on the couch, Ichigo looked around and then smiled at Grimmjow.

"Quite spacious," he said and Grimmjow looked up, confused.

"Yeah..." he said, hesitating with his response.

"I didn't think you would be so clean, even though you have such a high position."

Grimmjow looked completely gone. What the hell was Ichigo doing? It sounded like he was there for...the first time. When the thoughts got clear in Grimmjow's head, he grinned big.

"You have no idea how clean I am, not only the apartment."

Ichigo sat down next to Grimmjow.

"Oh? Is that an invitation to start something dirtier?" Ichigo teased and leaned back, stretching out his arms over the back of the couch.

Grimmjow grabbed Ichigo's right leg and pulled it up and behind him as he turned his body towards Ichigo. He pulled at Ichigo's hip and the other let his upper body slowly descend so he laid down. Grimmjow was quick to lie on top of Ichigo and put his left arm under Ichigo's head, lifting it up closer to his own.

"Well, we could always try and see how dirty you can be," he said and kissed Ichigo.

Ichigo let his arms wrap around Grimmjow's neck. When Grimmjow noticed that Ichigo wasn't kissing him back, he stopped and looked confused at Ichigo.

"What?"

"What did the doctor say?" Ichigo asked carefully, almost like he was afraid to ask.

Grimmjow sighed.

"I don't remember talking about my health on our first date," he said and kissed Ichigo's cheek.

"Yeah well... back then you didn't lose consciousness randomly. Right?"

The silence was heavy and Ichigo felt anger raise itself within him.

"You bastard! How long have you been ill? AND WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?" Ichigo pushed Grimmjow away and they both sat up, Ichigo glaring at Grimmjow who let his hand slip through his hair.

"Look, it wasn't this bad until our break-up. I used to get headaches and all that, but when we broke up it got worse."

"You better not be trying to blame this on me," Ichigo hissed.

Grimmjow shook his head.

"The break-up was my fault, I know that and you don't have to worry. The doctor said I'm fine."

"Fine, my ass! Something has to be wrong."

Grimmjow sighed again and once more slipped his hand through his hair.

"There are still tests that they don't have results from, but they think it's a serious case of migraine. When I get stressed or upset, the brain just shut off and I become unconscious. So now I'm on sick leave from work for another month and then I have to meet with the doctor and my boss."

Ichigo leaned forward, letting his left hand grab Grimmjow's right cheek and turned his head so that they looked at each other. Grimmjow noticed that Ichigo seemed to look for something and then he smiled and kissed him, seemingly satisfied.

"What..." he wondered but was interrupted by the doorbell.

They both looked at the hallway and the doorbell sounded again. Grimmjow stood up and Ichigo followed him with his eyes as he disappeared from the room. He heard him talking to someone and after a while Grimmjow came back into the room, and after him followed a pale guy, with black hair and green eyes. Ichigo noticed immediately that Grimmjow was tense and he looked angry.

"Ichigo, wait in the bedroom, will you?" Grimmjow gritted out between clenched teeth.

Ichigo crossed his arms and nodded to the seat next to him.

"Why don't you sit down before you get sick?"

They glared at each other, battling it out without words and after a few seconds, Grimmjow sighed and sat down next to Ichigo, sweeping his hand over the living room.

"Why don't you take a seat, Ulquiorra." Grimmjow said and sighed when Ulquiorra shook his head.

"Ichigo, was it? I thought Aizen had made it clear..." Ulquiorra was interrupted by Grimmjow.

"Sorry, but I don't think that's why you are here and Aizen has nothing more to do with this." Grimmjow glared at Ulquiorra who seemed unfazed, but he cleared his throat nonetheless.

"No, I only came on orders to hear how you were," Ulquiorra started but let his eyes fall back on Ichigo. "But there seems to be more to report to Aizen."

Grimmjow was about to stand up, but was stopped by Ichigo's hand.

"I don't know who you are, but I'm not stupid enough not to hear the threat in that statement. Grimmjow's work is on ice now for a month and what he does during that time is rest and nothing else. Whom he spends his sick leave with is his business." Ichigo said and his eyes didn't waver.

Ulquiorra stood there silent for a while.

"I will note that to Aizen," he said and turned to leave.

"Wait, Ulquiorra." Grimmjow sighed defeated. "Just please don't mention Ichigo right now. I will take it up with him myself on Monday."

Ulquiorra turned and stared before he nodded.

"NO!" Ichigo exclaimed and stood up. "I thought you had moved past that, Grimmjow. I thought you were past hiding me like something you are ashamed of."

Grimmjow grabbed Ichigo's hand.

"And that's why I'm talking to Aizen on Monday. Not this weekend, I want it alone with you without problems."

Ichigo felt frustrated; it was going back to the same track.

"I will report to Aizen that you are sick as reported from the hospital and then that I will check up on you on Monday. That is when I will report that you are still seeing your boyfriend."

Ichigo stopped from telling Grimmjow it was bizarre and looked at the green-eyed man.

"Wait..." Ichigo closed his eyes for a while before glaring at Ulquiorra. "You're telling me that Grimmjow's boss is the reason he has been an ass the past year?"

Ulquiorra didn't say anything as he turned to leave, but gave one last glance over his shoulder.

"I think you should let Grimmjow handle his boss. You have no idea what he can do."

And then Ulquiorra was gone; leaving Ichigo glaring at Grimmjow, who felt the pain in his head come back. Damn.  
Ichigo sat down in Grimmjow's lap and made their eyes connect.

"So...want to explain what the hell is going on?" Ichigo asked and Grimmjow felt the calm before the storm.

Grimmjow didn't say anything as he looked back at Ichigo, letting his hand slowly ascend and touch Ichigo's hair.

"You're right. It was Aizen who ordered me to break up with you. Something about something that I shouldn't be with you."

Ichigo snorted.

"'Something about something', huh? Well, that bastard can take his mafia attitude and..."

Grimmjow kissed Ichigo, making him go silent.

"I'll tell him on Monday," he said and grinned at Ichigo, who finally relaxed.

Pain shot through Grimmjow's head and he leaned back in the couch and held his head.

"What is it?" Ichigo asked worried.

"My head hurts again," Grimmjow answered and then looked curiously at the two hands that were massaging his chest.

"Well, I've heard that if you have a headache, you should relax. So how about we move to the bedroom and I help you..."

Ichigo yelped and didn't get further as Grimmjow stood up, forcing Ichigo to cling to him so he wouldn't fall onto the floor. Grimmjow moved as fast as he could through the apartment, with Ichigo clinging to him and as they reached the bedroom. Ichigo was easily thrown onto the bed and soon Grimmjow was on top of him.

"Well then, I think I should let you lead the way then." Grimmjow grinned before he hungrily kissed Ichigo.

Ichigo wrapped his arms around Grimmjow's neck as they kissed each other and Grimmjow let his hands travel up and down Ichigo's sides. Ichigo moaned and was about to deepen the kiss when Grimmjow let himself fall to the side and lay next to Ichigo, holding a hand over his eyes.

"Feels like I'm going to throw up," he said and sighed.

Ichigo let his hand rest on Grimmjow's chest.

"Why don't you sleep some then?" Ichigo suggested and Grimmjow looked at him.

He nodded and turned to lie on his side, looking at Ichigo who slowly drew patterns on Grimmjow's t-shirt as the other closed his eyes, and it didn't take long before he was asleep. Ichigo kissed his cheek before getting up and went to the living room. He could just as well ask Rukia to pass by his apartment and they could study together.

* * *

Renji looked up when the door to the bedroom closed. Byakuya was taking slow steps towards the bed clad only in his housecoat; well...Renji knew it was ONLY his housecoat.

"What are you thinking about?" Byakuya asked as he sat down on the bed next to Renji.

"Who was it?" Renji asked curiously, avoiding the question.

"It was my sister; she needed the key to Kurosaki's apartment."

Renji nodded absentmindedly before Byakuya leaned over him, his black hair flowing down and touching Renji's face.

"What were you thinking about?" he asked again and Renji turned beet red.

"I...I thought that maybe you should be working instead of..." he stuttered and was interrupted by Byakuya, who leaned down to brush their lips against each other.

"Let me worry about work." he said and kissed Renji.


	10. For 5 years

**Author's note, please read!**

**So I thought I'd make a small special chapter with letting you all know more about migraine and more about Renji and Byakuya~~**

**Thank you so much to Misc. Ink, my beta reader (this time I kinda just threw the work at you as soon as I was finished, I never looked it through. Sorry XD)**

**And please, even if you leave kudos at Ao3 (which I'm happy for) do leave a review here as well. They make me happy~~**

**I take commissions now, you can sign up here if you don't have a dA account otherwise the link is on my front page.**

**Characters are property of Tite Kubo, I own nothing more then the story in itself ^^**

**Rated M for language and smex between Grimmjow and Ichigo XD**

* * *

Rukia chuckled at Ichigo's surprised face.

"Nothing to be surprised about, I thought it would be obvious for you from this morning," she said and chuckled again as Ichigo shook his head.

"Sorry, but I just can't see someone like Byakuya with Renji. They are just so different."

Rukia sighed.

"Well, they are different, but so are you and Grimmjow. Right?"

Ichigo sighed as well.

"True, but still. It's just so weird to hear that they are a pair and have been so for a long time."

Rukia chuckled once more.

"They have been together since Renji was 17, only because my brother demanded him to stay that way even after he left. Renji broke it off when he left, but brother wouldn't hear of it."

Ichigo smiled.

"I can imagine that though. So, they've been an item for 6 years. That's a nice time, even though they haven't seen each other for 5 of those years."

Rukia chuckled again.

"Renji better have not been looking at another man. If brother even gets a hunch that he has," she paused to think about what word to use. "Renji will be a plucked chicken."

Ichigo burst out laughing and Rukia blushed.

"What's so funny about that?" Rukia asked dismayed.

"Those words. It's ridiculous."

Ichigo suddenly became silent as he heard the bed creak in the other room. They both sat silent, staring down the hallway from the living room, as they listened for more sounds. As there were no more, they breathed out in relief and it was then that they realized they had been holding their breath.  
They smiled at each other and Rukia waved with her hand in front of her face.

"That was lucky. We better remember that he should sleep and keep quiet." Rukia smiled.

Ichigo nodded and his thoughts went to the sleeping man in the other room. He had talked with Rukia about it and she had told him that all she knew about migraines was that one was like a severe headache. A pulsating pain that was felt on one side of the head and could be increased by stress, strain and believed to be so by certain food as well. But she had never heard of someone passing out from it.  
Rukia loved to read about illnesses and other things that had to do with health; Ichigo had never really understood why though.

"You said an attack could last from just a few hours to several days?" he asked.

Rukia nodded.

"Yeah, that's what I read. Sometimes they get nausea and have to throw up. They are sesitive to sound and light, and it's preferable if they sleep in a dark room that is cool. Summer has bad months for someone with migraines, because of the heat and the light."

Ichigo sighed. This really made him feel bad that he hadn't noticed that Grimmjow was sick earlier.

"If you bother to think that, then remember how he treated you for so long. No wonder you didn't notice."

Rukia seemed to know exactly what Ichigo was thinking and he smiled at her.

"True, but he's nice now. For how long, we have to wait and see."

"Didn't you say that he would talk to his boss on Monday? We will get to see then what happens, but I wonder..." she paused. "Do you think it has something to do with your dad being a cop?"

Ichigo sighed and ruffled his hair with his hands.

"I don't know, but it sounds most likely, doesn't it?"

Rukia seemed to think for a while.

"Doesn't your dad work within the division of narcotics? Do you think that he still might be involved in something and is afraid your dad will sniff because you are his son?"

"Don't say it like he's a dog," Ichigo sighed. "I don't want to think about it. There are so many questions and I just hope that Grimmjow can sort it out on Monday."

Rukia nodded.

"But it sounds dangerous," she whispered and looked down at the book in her lap.

Ichigo felt like the atmosphere was way too tense.

"But still, I can't believe Renji and Byakuya are dating. I mean, Renji is rough and gruff, while your brother is so clean and perfect."

Rukia chuckled.

"I guess Renji is something that my brother wants to polish," she said and Ichigo chuckled as well.

* * *

Renji woke up to something tickling his chest and when he looked down, he noticed that Byakuya was tracing his tattoos with a finger. Byakuya seemed really devoted to following the lines and watching as the muscles reacted to his touch. Renji sighed and grabbed his hand, making him look up.

"You didn't have these back then." Byakuya said and kissed Renji's chest.

"No, I got them over the years," Renji said as if Byakuya had asked about it.

"It makes you look barbaric, not a nice touch." Byakuya said and Renji huffed.

"Well, I thought you wanted a man that slammed his chest with his fist to protect you and be manly."

Renji smiled, but the smile faltered quickly as Byakuya looked sternly at him.

"Why did you get them?"

"Why?" Renji didn't know how to answer the question and it made him squirm under Byakuya's watchful eyes. "Because I wanted them?" he said as if asking and smiled nervously.

Byakuya snorted and looked down on the tattoos. He had been forgiving about the tattoos that Renji had on his face, but he didn't know if he was going to forgive that he had ruined his perfect body. Talking about forgiveness...

"I still haven't forgiven you for leaving," he said and locked eyes with Renji.

Renji sighed and sat up in the bed.

"Yeah, well, you know I had to leave and clean myself up," he said and avoided Byakuya's eyes.

"So you got more tattoos?" Byakuya asked and Renji blushed.

"Not clean myself up that way," Renji muttered. "You know I had problems with drugs and I knew I wasn't worthy of you the way I was."

"I decide if you are worthy or not," Byakuya said and Renji reacted over the anger in his voice.

Byakuya leaned forward, placing kisses on Renji's stomach and up to his chest.

"I wanted you to stay here," he said and Renji sighed again.

"And I'm telling you I couldn't. Not with the dealers still here and all."

"Then why are you back now? After 5 years?" Byakuya sounded hurt, because he knew Renji wasn't back for him.

Renji noticed he was still holding Byakuya's hand, and gave it a kiss. Byakuya used the same hand to let it slip through Renji's hair, grabbing the back of his head and pulling him into a kiss. Renji pressed Byakuya down onto the bed and laid on top of him. He broke the kiss and gently caressed Byakuya's sides.

"Don't bother with why. I'm back now, and this time I won't leave your side."

"You promised the same thing back then, remember?" Byakuya said and locked eyes with Renji.

"Yeah, but this time I'm more mature and ready to stand by my words," Renji said and kissed Byakuya, who sighed happily into the kiss.

Finally Renji was all his.


End file.
